Tuesday, January 31, 2006

The many faces of Muhammed (the ass-fucked prophet)

See my post below for an explanation...

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Monday, January 30, 2006

Fuck Muhammed up the ass with a very big stick

Ya'll may not be aware of this, but there's a budding outrage in many Muslim countries. Flags are burning, boycotts implemented, threats of terror being made.

Is it about the American forces in Iraq?
Is it about Israeli occupation of Palestine?
Is it about the people in "The Arab street" finally getting fed up with being oppressed by their own "leaders"?

Nah.

The issue that is now threatening to set the Islamic world ablaze is this: A Danish daily called "Jyllandsposten", in September 2005 wrote about the sad fact that a Danish writer could not find any artists to draw a picture of Islam's main prohet, Muhammed. In most Sunni-Islamic circles, creating a physical image of the Prophet is considered the worst possible blasphemy, and no artist dared make an image, out of fear for what crazy Islamists might do. Jyllandsposten then had 12 cartoonists make caricatures of varying quality, and printed the images in the paper.

And then... all hell broke loose.

So far, several Islamic countries have encouraged consumer boycotts and/or condemned Denmark, demanded apologies and that the newspaper be punished. In the Palestinian territories, they're burning Danish flags, and now also Norwegian flags, because a Christian Norwegian magazine printed the same pictures. There have been hundreds of death threats against the Danes, and quite a few at the Norwegians too. Local militants have warned Norwegian aid workers (these are the sad, misguided numbskulls who are actually trying to HELP the Palestinians, remember) to get the fuck out of Gaza within 48 hours - or else...

In addition to the Islamo-fascists, we also have the usual suspects: The terminally politically correct who act as the terrorists' useful idiots by demanding that we "respect Muslim sensibilitites". This from people who generally have no problem labeling everybody slightly to the right of Karl Marx as fascists, and who tend to show precious little respect for the sensibilities of their homegrown religious fanatics of the Christian variety. Not that they should, religion deserves no respect, what-so-fuckin-ever, I'm just pointing out the glaring hypocrisy involved.

Let me put this in no uncertain terms: If you belong to a school of thought that says it's a crime against God to portray his greatest prophet, you're pretty much fucked in the head to start with. If you then think it's a reasonable punishment to censor, threaten, or physically harm the ones doing the portraying, you're a dangerous, psychotic, neanderthal fascist. And if you're so blinded by your holier-than-thou political correctness that you can't see that these crazy fuckers are a mortal danger to western liberty, you're worthy of nothing but contempt.

So let me close this by stating my most sincere, heartfelt desire, phrased with all the sensibility I can muster towards "the great religion of Islam":

Fuck Muhammed.

Fuck him up the ass with a very big stick.

And fuck his followers too.

And since I'm a great believer in equal opportunity: Fuck Jesus, fuck God, fuck Allah, fuck Jahve, fuck Buddha, fuck the umpteen retarded gods of Hinduism too, fuck everybody who wishes to limit other people's freedom to say and think and do what they want - fuck'em all with the biggest, bluntest stick you can lay your grubby little hands on. Because that's what religions and their believers have been doing to us humans, ever since the first caveman started to communicate with the weather, and bashed his neighbor's head in with a rock when he refused to listen. They've shafted us royally, time and again, raped our sense of rationality, common sense and liberty. Time to return the favor.

Friday, January 20, 2006

Dumbfucks

As if we needed more proof, here is yet another study documenting that young people today have the average IQ of bricks. Allow me to quote:

"...most college students cannot handle many complex but common tasks, from understanding credit card offers to comparing the cost per ounce of food..." My dead grandmother could compare the cost of food, and she had seven years of schooling back in the 20s and 30s. Come to think of it, she probably still could, if you dug her up.

"More than 50 percent of students at four-year schools and more than 75 percent at two-year colleges lacked the skills to perform complex literacy tasks. That means they could not interpret a table about exercise and blood pressure, understand the arguments of newspaper editorials, compare credit card offers with different interest rates and annual fees or summarize results of a survey about parental involvement in school." I'll cut 'em some slack on not understanding newspaper editorials, they may have been tested using the NY Times' editorials, and no one outside the Democratic party's loony wing can understand the arguments made there.

"Almost 20 percent of students pursuing four-year degrees had only basic quantitative skills. For example, the students could not estimate if their car had enough gas to get to the service station." Free investment tip: Start buying shares in road rescue companies.

I feel his pain

Apparently, Matt Da(e)mon and Ben Allfeck, sorry, Affleck, are planning a remake of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. Asked about the rumors, Robert Redford said he found the thought "depressing". I admire his verbal constraint.

As Ambrose Bierce once wrote: "There are four kinds of Homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy". The thought of Allfeck and his only-slightly-less-gay-looking-than-DiCaprio sidekick fucking up one of history's all time greatest movies would put their violent demise in the last category. So, folks... should you see these guys on the street... feel free to engage in a realistic re-enactment of the movie's end!