Friday, June 30, 2017

South Africa: Second day at Kruger; south of the Voortrekker Road

When we reached the end of the Voortrekker Road, we immediately happened upon some elephants, cheerfully molesting the local flora.
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I got video of him.


A bit further up the road was another one. Hereafter, I shall refer to them as "ellies", the South African colloquial term for them.
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I got video of this one too.


We then stopped for lunch at Afsaal picnic site, where you can buy pretty decent meals for a very reasonable price. This site has lots of birds, who swoop down to eat the food that tourists leave behind. The bravest one is probably this type of starling.
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They will literally gang up, like a bunch of cute lil' featherball thugs.
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In addition, there are several small vervet monkeys there, who have specialized in stealing food out of garbage cans. I also witnessed first hand how they would steal food from the tables as soon as the people turned their backs for a split second.
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Lids are of little help against these very clever rascals.
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After lunch, we drove further south and immediately saw this little group of elephants.
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Then I spotted, on the other side of the road, a solitary rhino walking towards us.
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We were hoping that he'd eventually cross the road right in front of us, because that was the course he was on. Sadly he decided to lie down and take a nap halfway.
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But not before I got video footage of him.


We took a couple of detours into loop roads as it was now early afternoon and very hot, and we were desperately trying to find lions and/or leopards. We didn't see any, but we did come across a herd of ellies.
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They were pretty damn close, and these two were on a direct collision course with us, but veered off into the bush with the rest of the herd when a big ol' truck came roaring down the road in the other direction. We drove a few meters on to turn around and get some pics from the other side, but by then the ellies were gone. It's almost eerie how a big flock of the largest mammals on earth can disappear into the bush without a trace.
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We then went the last couple of miles down to Malelane Gate, where there is a bridge across the Crocodile River. Here, we first saw a bunch of hippos chilling in the sun.
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Then, on the other side, we saw about half a dozen crocodiles doing the same thing.
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This solitary hippo was submerged very close to the crocs, but the species kept a respectful distance from one another.
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We then went back in the park and saw some more giraffes.
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Closer to the Berg-en-Dal camp we came across a huge herd of giraffes. I got video.


Then a huge flock of baboons ran across the road...
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It was just one of those days (aka any ol' day in Kruger).
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An impala has his doubts about me.
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Some more little piggys.
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Then we came across a whole family of rhinos across the valley from us. I counted five animals in all.
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I got these on tape too.


Oh, yeah.


On our way out of the park we were detained for five minutes, because this massive herd of cape buffalo wanted to cross the road. Whatever a buffalo wants, you will give him. This includes the right of way, your rolex and your car keys.
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In the evening, we went to Tank's Pub, outside Hazyview. It was recommended on Tripadvisor and did not let us down. Huge portions of the best grub imaginable, at what, to a Norwegian, was a pittance. Plus for very nice staff, who we spoke to at length about everything South African. Our waitress was walking around with a metal cast on one leg, where a crocodile had bit her a couple of months before. We were also warned to watch out for hippos on the road back to town. Yeah, it was that kind of place.
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South Africa: Second day at Kruger; the Voortrekker Road

After our initial safari, it was time to venture into Kruger on our own. I had booked entry online several weeks in advance. The rules are quite simple; as of summer 2017 you need to pay ZAR304 (appx. $22) in a "conservation fee" per person in your vehicle. You will need to indicate your arrival within a 2-hour slot, plus the gate you'll be driving in through. You can book this several months in advance and it ensures you will get in IF you arrive at the correct place, within your allotted time period. If not, you may find yourself turned away if you arrive in peak season. We made sure to be at the respective entrance gates before anything opened, but we still had to wait a few minutes every time, not least because, this being Africa, everything takes an inordinate amount of time and bureaucracy to happen.

Sunrise over a misty South African landscape. As with most wildlife, the hours around the rising and the setting of the sun are when you're most likely to see it in Kruger.
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After a couple of false starts, we were finally on the Voortrekker Road and the photo ops started coming. First, I took this short video of a cape buffalo. Widely and rightly feared as one of the great mankillers of Africa, it was peacefully grazing this morning.


Then, the ubiquitous impala, of which there are well over a hundred thousand in Kruger. Their numbers dwarf that of any other animal in the park and they provide a welcome snack for the predators therein.
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I then shot a video of a small herd of Zebras walking towards us.


Solitary zebra eyeing me skeptically.
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A gnu (aka wildebeest).
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And a kudu.
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Then the fun really started. By the roadside, not five feet from our car, we spotted a family of hyenas. They were snoozing away and cared not a fuck about our presence. Mommy was suckling her two young 'uns, while dad was snoring heavily in the shade.
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I got a video of 'em.


Greedy lil' bastards they were.
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More video. The youngsters make these cute lil' snorting noises when they feed.


Then we spotted, on the other side of the road, a single mom and a single little baby hyena. He was walking around sniffing the grass and generally being the cutestest little puppy in the world.
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Awwwwwwww.
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Naturally, I got video of him.


Then we came across these two giraffes, who put on quite the show for us. I forgot to take pics, but I shot these two videos.


At first, I thought they were canoodling, but I have later come to learn this behavior is a typical dominance game between males.

Quote of the Day

A woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a smoke.
- Rudyard Kipling

Thursday, June 29, 2017

South Africa: Arrival & First Day at Kruger

So, I went to Africa. I'd never ever been there, but I'd looked into going a couple of times. It always stranded on my fear of germs, bugs and assorted ways of dying that you don't generally encounter in civilized parts of the world. But this time I'd planned meticulously for a trip to the famed Kruger National Park and had lured my San Diego peeps into landing in Johannesburg within an hour of myself.

The flight yesterday was uneventful, the picking up of the rental car likewise and even the 5-hour or so trip to our lodgings in Hazyview, right outside Kruger, went fairly smoothly (I only took the wrong road twice, both times due to a horrendous lack of signposting). Once we'd settled in at the hotel we had a huge dinner and in the wee early hours today (I'm talking pick-up outside the hotel at 5am), we went on a real, muthafuckin safari tour of the western parts of the park.

The view from our front porch. We stayed at Nabana Lodge, where the food was good and the rooms were clean, but chilly. The wifi was near non-existent and they closed down the common area (the only place with some chance of a connection) around 9pm.
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Our first encounter with the local wildlife was this very friendly golden retriever, who enjoyed both a good cuddle and some choice pieces of my steak.
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We drove in through the Numbi gate, which goes through a rougher neighborhood, but has much shorter lines than the Phabeni gate a bit further north. Both are about 15-20 minutes from Hazyview proper. We drove a small truck and let me tell you, it was COLD, especially since the wind came wailing through exposed areas of the canvas walls. Brrrr. Still, I would recommend a safari, at least for your first visit to the park. It helps you get a feel for the layout and distances and since the cars are in radio contact, you will usually see some stuff you probably would have otherwise missed. We were reasonably happy with our tour, although I thought our guide was a bit of a jerk - he told us he would not speak to people unless they greeted him properly first. Still, he seemed well acquainted with the animals of the park and fairly free of political correctness in his description of the various nationalities that came to visit. According to him, the Chinese were mainly interested in how something tasted, while people from India were very racist towards the blacks.

My first pic inside the park: A lion drinking at one of the articially built reservoirs.
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As you can see, it was still a bit dark. We would never have gone here and seen this, if not for splurging on a safari. Just seeing this beautiful, young male lion was worth the cost of the safari.
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A bit later, we came to the Kruger gate and saw our first warthog. It is quite common to see them kneeling, as they're digging for food in the ground with their snouts.
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We had brunch at the main camp of Kruger, Skukuza. They have a very good restaurant there, where you can load up with tons of carbs, protein and fat at very reasonable prices.
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Typical South African river landscape.
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We soon saw our first of many, many elephants. We were told that there were actually too many of them in the park and they were wreaking havoc with some of the trees and plant life there. They're not exactly careful eaters when they start tearing up a tree.
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A whole family of warthogs.
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Ever the Hawkeye, I spotted our only rhino of the day (but far from the last of the trip). Early on, we were told by our guide that he wanted to just do very brief stops, if stopping at all, when we saw ordinary animals like elephants and impalas and giraffes, because those were animals we'd be able to see on our own later on. However, when I questioningly pointed out the rhino, the message was clear: "We stop for rhinos". He later told us that, due to the poaching problem, the tour guides would never reveal the location of rhinos over the radio; in fact it was not advisable to even point them out to other cars even when you were looking right at one. The poachers are sneaky bastards and will often scout and pose as regular tourists.
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We soon found out that this rhino had a companion. They were ambling along peacefully, so maybe it was mother and child or a couple looking to mate.
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My first lioness pic. About half a dozen of 'em had taken down a cape buffalo and were merrily devouring the carcass. Again, we would probably not have happened upon this, if not for the radio our guide had.
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Killing buffalo is hard work. This was probably the top female of the pack and the one chiefly responsible for the kill. She was visibly panting hard the whole time we were there, and that must have been a good 20-30 minutes.
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Here is my first video from Kruger, a one minute clip of the lions feasting on the buffalo.


We also caught a brief glimpse of some giraffes.
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This kudu was not angry with me, just very, very disappointed.
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Some purdy scenery from the Voortrekker Road, a gravel road that stretches from a bit east of Numbi gate to roughly the Afsaal picnic site. To us, it proved a veritable gold mine of photo ops the next day.
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This cape buffalo was sticking his tongue out at me. Very rude.
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Finally, these buffalo were part shocked, part disgusted to see us. They were not the first, nor the last in that respect.
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Quote of the Day

Because I have loved life, I shall have no sorrow to die.
I have sent up my gladness on wings, to be lost in the blue of the sky.
I have run and leaped with the rain, I have taken the wind to my breast.
My cheek like a drowsy child to the face of the earth I have pressed.
Because I have loved life, I shall have no sorrow to die.
- Amelia J. Burr, "A Song of Living"

Wednesday, June 28, 2017

Quote of the Day

That’s the difference between me and the rest of the world! Happiness isn’t good enough for me! I demand euphoria!
- Bill Watterson, American cartoonist "Calvin and Hobbes"

Tuesday, June 27, 2017

Quote of the Day

Relations are simply a tedious pack of people, who haven’t got the remotest knowledge of how to live, nor the smallest instinct about when to die.
- Oscar Wilde

Monday, June 26, 2017

Quote of the Day

‘I hate a Roman named Status Quo!’ he said to me. ‘Stuff your eyes with wonder,’ he said, ‘live as if you’d drop dead in ten seconds. See the world. It’s more fantastic than any dream made or paid for in factories. Ask for no guarantees; ask for no security, there never was such an animal. And if there were, it would be related to the great sloth which hangs upside down in a tree all day every day, sleeping its life away. To hell with that,’ he said, ‘shake the tree and knock the great sloth down on his ass.’
- Ray Bradbury, "Fahrenheit 451"

Sunday, June 25, 2017

Quote of the Day

Every great advance in science has issued from a new audacity of the imagination.
- John Dewey

Saturday, June 24, 2017

Quote of the Day

Good intentions will always be pleaded for every assumption of authority. It is hardly too strong to say that the Constitution was made to guard the people against the dangers of good intentions. There are men in all ages who mean to govern well, but they mean to govern. They promise to be good masters, but they mean to be masters.
- Daniel Webster

Friday, June 23, 2017

Quote of the Day

As soon as laws are necessary for men, they are no longer fit for freedom.
- Pythagoras

Thursday, June 22, 2017

Quote of the Day

Where the State begins, individual liberty ceases, and vice versa.
- Mikhail Bakunin

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Quote of the Day

There is no virtue in compulsory government charity, and there is no virtue in advocating it. A politician who portrays himself as «caring» and «sensitive» because he wants to expand the government’s charitable programs is merely saying that he’s willing to try to do good with other people’s money. Well, who isn’t? And a voter who takes pride in supporting such programs is telling us that he’ll do good with his own money -- if a gun is held to his head.
- P.J. O’Rourke

Tuesday, June 20, 2017

Quote of the Day

They copied all they could follow
but they couldn’t copy my mind
so I left them sweating and stealing
a year and a half behind.
- Rudyard Kipling

Monday, June 19, 2017

Quote of the Day

Congress can raise taxes because it can persuade a sizable fraction of the populace that somebody else will pay.
- Milton Friedman

Sunday, June 18, 2017

Quote of the Day

Atheism and Religion are but two sides of the same coin.
One prefers to use its head, while the other relies on tales.
- Unknown

Saturday, June 17, 2017

Quote of the Day

"If hate were people, I'd be China!"
- Daniel Stern in "City Slickers"

Friday, June 16, 2017

Quote of the Day

I thought my razor was dull until I heard his speech.
- Groucho Marx

Thursday, June 15, 2017

Quote of the Day

"The London Underground is not a political movement!"
- Jamie Lee Curtis in "A Fish Called Wanda"

Wednesday, June 14, 2017

Quote of the Day

Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
- Mae West

Tuesday, June 13, 2017

Quote of the Day

I've had a wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.
- Groucho Marx

Monday, June 12, 2017

Quote of the Day

Dale Putley: Jack, look at this.
Jack Lawrence: It's money. I remember it from when I was single.
- Billy Crystal in "Father's Day"

Sunday, June 11, 2017

Quote of the Day

It is the Soviet Union that runs against the tide of history.... [It is] the march of freedom and democracy which will leave Marxism- Leninism on the ash heap of history as it has left other tyrannies which stifle the freedom and muzzle the self-expression of the people.
- Ronald Reagan

Saturday, June 10, 2017

Quote of the Day

If you want to make enemies, try to change something.
- Woodrow Wilson

Friday, June 9, 2017

Quote of the Day

Let us beware that while they [Soviet rulers] preach the supremacy of the state, declare its omnipotence over individual man, and predict its eventual domination over all the peoples of the earth, they are the focus of evil in the modern world ... beware the temptation to ignore the facts of history and the aggressive impulses of an evil empire, to simply call the arms race a giant misunderstanding and thereby remove yourself from the struggle between right and wrong, good and evil.
- Ronald Reagan

Thursday, June 8, 2017

Quote of the Day

Speak softly and carry a big stick.
- Teddy Roosevelt

Wednesday, June 7, 2017

Quote of the Day

Let every nation know, whether it wishes us well or ill, we shall pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose any foe, to assure the survival and success of liberty.
- John F. Kennedy

Tuesday, June 6, 2017

Quote of the Day

We will always remember. We will always be proud. We will always be prepared, so we may always be free.
- Ronald Reagan, Normandy, France, June 6, 1984

Monday, June 5, 2017

Quote of the Day

Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable.
-John F. Kennedy

Sunday, June 4, 2017

Quote of the Day

Sunt lacrimae rerum et mentem mortalia tangunt.
[Human deeds have their tears, and mortality touches the heart.]
- Virgil

Saturday, June 3, 2017

Quote of the Day

Delenda est Carthago.
[Carthage must be destroyed.]
- Cato the Elder

Friday, June 2, 2017

Quote of the Day

Mundus vult decipi
[The world wants to be deceived]
- Cajus Arbiter Petronius

Thursday, June 1, 2017

Quote of the Day

Homo sum; nihil humanum a me alienum est
[I am human and nothing human is alien to me]
- Terents, Roman poet 195-159 BC