This picture is going to provide me with so much fun...
Tuesday, December 28, 2004
Why America is top dog
The Washington Times is running a series of articles explaining why the US is top dog and the rest of us suck. Highly recommended reading!
Sunday, December 26, 2004
Monkey business
In the first place God made idiots; this was for practice; then he made school boards.
- Mark Twain
This is just the latest in a long series of attacks on science, of course... The School Board in Dover, PA has voted to include "Intelligent Design" as an alternative to evolution in high school science lessons. To understand why this is a moronic idea, please go here.
I've always found it incredible that an advanced country such as the US is still infested with so many ignorant dimwits of the religious persuasion. I guess the monkey part of the brain kicks in when ingrained beliefs and prejudices are challenged by facts...
- Mark Twain
This is just the latest in a long series of attacks on science, of course... The School Board in Dover, PA has voted to include "Intelligent Design" as an alternative to evolution in high school science lessons. To understand why this is a moronic idea, please go here.
I've always found it incredible that an advanced country such as the US is still infested with so many ignorant dimwits of the religious persuasion. I guess the monkey part of the brain kicks in when ingrained beliefs and prejudices are challenged by facts...
Saturday, December 25, 2004
I'm going to hell for this...
I'm going to make lots of variations on this theme - be warned...
muahahahahaaaaa
Friday, December 24, 2004
Thursday, December 23, 2004
Forza Italia!
Well, at least ONE aspect of the Christmas spirit seems to have caught me: I'm spending money like a drunken sailor.
Today, I bought a language course in Italian. It cost me almost $100.
Now, I've always loved opera, and Italy has plenty of interesting history, culture, cuisine etc, but to learn the actual language? My credo has always been that anything worth reading exists in an English translation and that anyone who does not speak English is, by definition, not worth my time anyway.
Only time can tell if I'll actually follow through on this or if the course will simply gather dust on a shelf... the odds are 50-50 at best.
Today, I bought a language course in Italian. It cost me almost $100.
Now, I've always loved opera, and Italy has plenty of interesting history, culture, cuisine etc, but to learn the actual language? My credo has always been that anything worth reading exists in an English translation and that anyone who does not speak English is, by definition, not worth my time anyway.
Only time can tell if I'll actually follow through on this or if the course will simply gather dust on a shelf... the odds are 50-50 at best.
Here, kitty, kitty
We all know that many people have more money than brains. The latest example is this Texan woman who has cloned her dead cat... to the price of $50,000!
"He is identical. I have not been able to see one difference" said the woman. Well DUH, a clone is not different from an an identical twin, biologically speaking (unless something goes wrong with the cloning process, as sometimes happen). The woman also said her dead cat "was exceptionally intelligent. He knew 11 commands." We can safely assume he was smarter than his owner - no cat would ever spend 50k on a replica of a human being.
The new kitten, needless to say, is wewy adowable.
Aw, c'mon... ya knows I lubs 'em.
"He is identical. I have not been able to see one difference" said the woman. Well DUH, a clone is not different from an an identical twin, biologically speaking (unless something goes wrong with the cloning process, as sometimes happen). The woman also said her dead cat "was exceptionally intelligent. He knew 11 commands." We can safely assume he was smarter than his owner - no cat would ever spend 50k on a replica of a human being.
The new kitten, needless to say, is wewy adowable.
Aw, c'mon... ya knows I lubs 'em.
Wednesday, December 22, 2004
Surrender monkeys rob Santa
Delighted at finally finding someone they could fight and win, French teenagers have robbed Santa Clause. Way to go, frogs!
Merry fuckin xmas
Went to the dentist today. $120 poorer, a numb jaw and the taste of tranquilizer in my mouth. Ho ho ho.
Tuesday, December 21, 2004
Opinions are like assholes: Full of crap.
A new survey shows that a majority of Americans think the Iraq war was a mistake, that it is too early for elections in Iraq, etc etc. All that this shows is that the public have the attention span of goldfish. When the news is full of horror stories, the public will go "ahhhh, the skies are falling". When the news is of advancing US troops or dead terrorists, they will wave the flag and cheer.
His numerous faults aside, I am glad America has a president that seems to put conviction and principle ahead of fickle public opinion shaped by whatever was on the evening news the night before the survey was taken.
His numerous faults aside, I am glad America has a president that seems to put conviction and principle ahead of fickle public opinion shaped by whatever was on the evening news the night before the survey was taken.
No it doesn't, you moron!
Sloppy goddamn morons of the press... USA Today writes:
"The ancient Chinese art of acupuncture offered people with arthritis of the knee significant pain relief, but it didn't seem to help people with chronic neck pain, according to two scientific studies out today.
Acupuncture, the practice of inserting needles into specific body points, has been practiced for some 2,000 years by the Chinese. But it has never been fully accepted or studied by U.S. physicians or scientists."
All good, except that it's not remotely true. What the press fails to grasp when writing about acupuncture, is that it is a wholly different phenomenon than today's practice of sticking needles in people. Allow me to explain: Acupuncture is a Chinese "art" based on a metaphysical concept. The method is based on a belief in various uninformed, superstitious dribble like "chi", "yin", "yang" and such. The needles are stuck in certain places in order to unblock unseen (and non-existing) "energy meridians" in the body. It is these blocks, according to the ancient Chinese, that cause illness, and when the needles unblock the meridians, the illness will go away.
What the two studies have shown is something quite different, according to the actual researchers, (scientists can usually be counted on to be somewhat more precise in their statements than your average media hack):
"Acupuncture might work by spurring the body to release natural painkilling substances called endorphins"
"Acupuncture is not a cure"
In other words: Sticking needles in people does not cure any illnesses (thus disproving the basic tenets of actual acupuncture) and there is a perfectly scientific, rational explanation for any physical effect you might get from it.
I don't think it is unlikely that stimulating certain sensitive parts of the body can be medically beneficial - we know it has obvious psychological benefits (a good back rub... mmmmmm!). What these studies do is to increase our knowledge and hopefully our efficiency in applying such stimulation in practical medical treatment. What they do NOT is to indicate that there is any truth whatsoever to the ancient Chinese superstition of acupuncture.
"The ancient Chinese art of acupuncture offered people with arthritis of the knee significant pain relief, but it didn't seem to help people with chronic neck pain, according to two scientific studies out today.
Acupuncture, the practice of inserting needles into specific body points, has been practiced for some 2,000 years by the Chinese. But it has never been fully accepted or studied by U.S. physicians or scientists."
All good, except that it's not remotely true. What the press fails to grasp when writing about acupuncture, is that it is a wholly different phenomenon than today's practice of sticking needles in people. Allow me to explain: Acupuncture is a Chinese "art" based on a metaphysical concept. The method is based on a belief in various uninformed, superstitious dribble like "chi", "yin", "yang" and such. The needles are stuck in certain places in order to unblock unseen (and non-existing) "energy meridians" in the body. It is these blocks, according to the ancient Chinese, that cause illness, and when the needles unblock the meridians, the illness will go away.
What the two studies have shown is something quite different, according to the actual researchers, (scientists can usually be counted on to be somewhat more precise in their statements than your average media hack):
"Acupuncture might work by spurring the body to release natural painkilling substances called endorphins"
"Acupuncture is not a cure"
In other words: Sticking needles in people does not cure any illnesses (thus disproving the basic tenets of actual acupuncture) and there is a perfectly scientific, rational explanation for any physical effect you might get from it.
I don't think it is unlikely that stimulating certain sensitive parts of the body can be medically beneficial - we know it has obvious psychological benefits (a good back rub... mmmmmm!). What these studies do is to increase our knowledge and hopefully our efficiency in applying such stimulation in practical medical treatment. What they do NOT is to indicate that there is any truth whatsoever to the ancient Chinese superstition of acupuncture.
Fun, fun fun
Wheeeeeeeeeeee! *clapping hands*
The 6th Harry Potter book has been completed, and will probably be released sometime in 2005. I think these books are good fun and jolly entertaining. Besides, anything that can make people read is a good thing by me. I even have Norwegian pupils who have read the books in English, so Potter provides language training as well.
The 6th Harry Potter book has been completed, and will probably be released sometime in 2005. I think these books are good fun and jolly entertaining. Besides, anything that can make people read is a good thing by me. I even have Norwegian pupils who have read the books in English, so Potter provides language training as well.
Monday, December 20, 2004
Kill the telemarketers
I am sure this will be a recurring theme on this blog:
TELEMARKETERS MUST DIE.
They have indirectly maimed me!
'Tis true!
Last week I unplugged my phone in order to take a little afternoon nap, undisturbed by pestering calls from perky young assholes trying to pimp some worthless service or charity or whatever (they should have learned by now that the only things I give freely are wedgies and insults). Later in the evening I managed to STEP on the loose plug. For those of you not familiar with Norwegian phones, the thingy that goes into the wall has three sharp metal ends sticking out - or in this case firmly sticking INTO my foot. I'm still limping badly, the wound looks disgusting and I'm missing a party tonight because of it. DIE, TELEMARKETERS, DIE!!!
TELEMARKETERS MUST DIE.
They have indirectly maimed me!
'Tis true!
Last week I unplugged my phone in order to take a little afternoon nap, undisturbed by pestering calls from perky young assholes trying to pimp some worthless service or charity or whatever (they should have learned by now that the only things I give freely are wedgies and insults). Later in the evening I managed to STEP on the loose plug. For those of you not familiar with Norwegian phones, the thingy that goes into the wall has three sharp metal ends sticking out - or in this case firmly sticking INTO my foot. I'm still limping badly, the wound looks disgusting and I'm missing a party tonight because of it. DIE, TELEMARKETERS, DIE!!!
A cold day in hell
"Freezing temperatures hit northern Florida on Monday morning"
MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAA. Serves you right, you smug bastards! Hope ya'll freeze to death in slow, horribly painful ways.
MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAA. Serves you right, you smug bastards! Hope ya'll freeze to death in slow, horribly painful ways.
Imaginary Friends
(No, I'm not talking about my colleagues, nor about my family...)
According to a study, having imaginary friends in childhood can be of real psychological help to kids. The study claims two thirds have had such "friends" by the time they're seven, and 1/3 still have them at that point.
My guess is that we're now seeing the consequences of all that shit people were smoking in the 60s...
I had some imaginary friends myself, of course, when I was little - but they would only play with each other. Still, I'll use this study for all that it's worth the next time I'm in court because of someting the voices told me to do (like creating a blog).
According to a study, having imaginary friends in childhood can be of real psychological help to kids. The study claims two thirds have had such "friends" by the time they're seven, and 1/3 still have them at that point.
My guess is that we're now seeing the consequences of all that shit people were smoking in the 60s...
I had some imaginary friends myself, of course, when I was little - but they would only play with each other. Still, I'll use this study for all that it's worth the next time I'm in court because of someting the voices told me to do (like creating a blog).
In other news...
* In Florida, a 96 year old woman is running for re-election as mayor of a retirement community.
I'm not sure if I can improve on this kind of news, so I'll just move on.
* On Wall Street, they're getting ready to sell the famous "Charging Bull" sculpture.
Guess they've got enough bull as it is.
* According to a new poll, Americans claim that on a daily basis they are six times more likely to say a prayer than to take a drink.
Seems Nietzsche's quip about the two great European narcotics being alcohol and Christianity applies to the US as well.
In addition, only 23% would admit to swearing more than once a day. No word on how often they lie to pollsters, though.
I'm not sure if I can improve on this kind of news, so I'll just move on.
* On Wall Street, they're getting ready to sell the famous "Charging Bull" sculpture.
Guess they've got enough bull as it is.
* According to a new poll, Americans claim that on a daily basis they are six times more likely to say a prayer than to take a drink.
Seems Nietzsche's quip about the two great European narcotics being alcohol and Christianity applies to the US as well.
In addition, only 23% would admit to swearing more than once a day. No word on how often they lie to pollsters, though.
Sunday, December 19, 2004
Church Signs from Hell
This will be a weekly feature... or more often, if I feel the urge... muahahahahaaaaaaaaa!
And YES, I come up with the texts myself... cuz I is funneeeee!
And YES, I come up with the texts myself... cuz I is funneeeee!
Person of the Year 2004
TIME Magazine has chosen president George W. Bush as its "Person of the Year". Well, if they insist on overlooking me again, I guess he's as good a choice as any. Hrmph!
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