An old classic for our young readers

Many of you have probably never heard of the great entertainer Tom Lehrer, but I think you all deserve to read the lyrics to his "Vatican Rag"... If you're not familiar with Lehrer, go out and buy one of his CDs.

The Vatican Rag

First you get down on your knees,
Fiddle with your rosaries,
Bow your head with great respect,
And genuflect, genuflect, genuflect!

Do whatever steps you want if
You have cleared them with the Pontiff.
Everybody say his own
Kyrie eleison,
Doin' the Vatican Rag.

Get in line in that processional,
Step into that small confessional.
There the guy who's got religion'll
Tell you if your sin's original.
If it is, try playin' it safer,
Drink the wine and chew the wafer,
Two, four, six, eight,
Time to transubstantiate!

So get down upon your knees,
Fiddle with your rosaries,
Bow your head with great respect,
And genuflect, genuflect, genuflect!

Make a cross on your abdomen,
When in Rome do like a Roman;
Ave Maria, Gee, it's good to see ya.
Gettin' ecstatic an'
Sorta dramatic an'
Doin' the Vatican Rag!