It took me three days of driving through Europe to get back to Aniane *sigh*. A traffic jam caused by an accident in Sweden, two long queues in Germany and a huge clusterfuck in France, basically stretching from Lyon down to the exit to Nimes (check the map!). It's a miracle I haven't gone insane yet, although I've been close to screaming my lungs out in the privacy of my car. I've managed to get my picture taken TWICE, and not for pass photo purposes... I'll probably get a couple of "nice" surprises in the mail in the coming months, courtesy of the German and French traffic police, respectively.
For most of the day I've had a Czech couple in the car with me. Nice kids, though their body odor left something to be desired. Then again, it's hard to stay clean when you've been thumbing down through Europe for 4 days already. They told me only foreigners had stopped for them in France, mwahahaha. The girl, who was the only English speaker, endeared herself to me when she browsed through all my travel CDs and after squealing with delight several times, ended up with "Born to Run" as her first choice. There's still good in the world, people.
Soon I shall go out and stuff face at the local cafe. The weather forecast is sunny for pretty much all of next week ('cept Monday), and whatever rain does fall I shall take as a welcome break. The weather forecast for Oslo is rain or partially cloudy at best for ten days, muahahahaha!
Also, I've always wanted to use the word clusterfuck in a post, and now I have. Wheeee!
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Quote of the Day
Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they translate into their own language and forthwith it is something entirely different.
- Goethe
- Goethe
Friday, July 30, 2010
Quote of the Day
I do not dislike the French from the vulgar antipathy between neighbouring nations, but for their insolent and unfounded airs of superiority.
- Horace Walpole
- Horace Walpole
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Quote of the Day
George, Prince of Wales: I’m as happy as a Frenchman who has just invented a pair of self removing trousers!
- Hugh Laurie in "Black Adder"
- Hugh Laurie in "Black Adder"
Fuck that
I've been in Norway since 1am Wednesday morning and I am already hitting the proverbial walls, going gaga with the urge to travel. So I'm packing my stuff and heading back down to Aniane, where I've prepaid the house till the 7th of August. Yes, I am insane.
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Vroom, vroom
Ok, I am back in Norway after two days of insane driving from Aniane. I left that city just before 9am Monday and promptly hit a traffic jam into Montpellier. Argh. After getting on the motorway, I had a little experience that made me almost question my decicion to leave, and at least partially restored my faith in the future of the human race:
I stopped at a gas station to load up on goodies, and when I came to the counter to pay, I said a resounding "morning" in answer to the chirpy "bonjour" they always feed you. Usually the French will go into lock down mode when I greet them in English - they keep speaking French, or they lose all ability to talk and just point at the numbers on the screen. But not this young frog! She can't have been more than 18, but she actually grinned, and said "Do you need a bag with that, Monseiur?"... and followed up with "here is your change" and when I left, she grinned even wider and uttered that most American of phrases... "Have a nice day". She seemed so cheerful and proud to be speaking English I could have cried.
A few miles further up the road, somewhere after Nimes, I stopped and picked up two hitchhikers; two Belgian girls heading back to Brussels after a theater festival in some town which has temporarily escaped my mind. One of them spoke some English, and we had a jolly good time talking and playing music for hours. They drove with me all the way to Luxembourg, where "every Belgian stops to fill up with cheap gas", and they could hitch a ride for the final leg of the trip. As I left they were loading their stuff into the trunk of a Belgian car, so I guess they made it back safe and sound.
After Luxembourg the directions became ever more confusing so I decided to just trust my map, which amounted to almost the same thing, I later discovered. I spent the night in an overpriced hotel along the A 1, somewhere between Cologne and Dortmund.
Tuesday I va-va-vroomed my way up Germany, picking up a Latvian couple and deposing them at the airport in Hamburg. The rest of the ride was relatively uneventful - the long trek up western Sweden was, as usual, a long dark teatime of the soul. I came home at 1am this morning. Now I am going to go over my finances and see if I have the money to do anything more than just exist for the next three weeks... there's also about two weeks of Italy stuff to blog, wheeee! Keep watching this space!
The last farewell... me and some of the staff at the Cafe d'Esplanade in Aniane, where I took most of my dinners. Nice people all, but they spoke maybe 20 words of English between them.
This is a little lighthouse on the tiny island of Sprogø, between the two bridges of the Danish Storebæltsforbindelsen. I've always wanted to live here.
Elvis is alive, at least according to this German spedition company.
I stopped at a gas station to load up on goodies, and when I came to the counter to pay, I said a resounding "morning" in answer to the chirpy "bonjour" they always feed you. Usually the French will go into lock down mode when I greet them in English - they keep speaking French, or they lose all ability to talk and just point at the numbers on the screen. But not this young frog! She can't have been more than 18, but she actually grinned, and said "Do you need a bag with that, Monseiur?"... and followed up with "here is your change" and when I left, she grinned even wider and uttered that most American of phrases... "Have a nice day". She seemed so cheerful and proud to be speaking English I could have cried.
A few miles further up the road, somewhere after Nimes, I stopped and picked up two hitchhikers; two Belgian girls heading back to Brussels after a theater festival in some town which has temporarily escaped my mind. One of them spoke some English, and we had a jolly good time talking and playing music for hours. They drove with me all the way to Luxembourg, where "every Belgian stops to fill up with cheap gas", and they could hitch a ride for the final leg of the trip. As I left they were loading their stuff into the trunk of a Belgian car, so I guess they made it back safe and sound.
After Luxembourg the directions became ever more confusing so I decided to just trust my map, which amounted to almost the same thing, I later discovered. I spent the night in an overpriced hotel along the A 1, somewhere between Cologne and Dortmund.
Tuesday I va-va-vroomed my way up Germany, picking up a Latvian couple and deposing them at the airport in Hamburg. The rest of the ride was relatively uneventful - the long trek up western Sweden was, as usual, a long dark teatime of the soul. I came home at 1am this morning. Now I am going to go over my finances and see if I have the money to do anything more than just exist for the next three weeks... there's also about two weeks of Italy stuff to blog, wheeee! Keep watching this space!
The last farewell... me and some of the staff at the Cafe d'Esplanade in Aniane, where I took most of my dinners. Nice people all, but they spoke maybe 20 words of English between them.
This is a little lighthouse on the tiny island of Sprogø, between the two bridges of the Danish Storebæltsforbindelsen. I've always wanted to live here.
Elvis is alive, at least according to this German spedition company.
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Monday, July 26, 2010
Quote of the Day
France has neither winter nor summer nor morals. Apart from these drawbacks it is a fine country. France has usually been governed by prostitutes.
- Mark Twain
- Mark Twain
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Martigues
On our way to the airport in Marseilles Friday, Nina and I stopped and lunched at Martigues, a cozy little town by the sea, or at least by a canal that leads to the sea... All pics here.
Bridges over to an island. I saw a sign saying that during times of festivities, the island was closed for car traffic to anyone not wearing a badge or something like that.
A wall painting. Wheee!
Bridges over to an island. I saw a sign saying that during times of festivities, the island was closed for car traffic to anyone not wearing a badge or something like that.
A wall painting. Wheee!
Saint Baudille
Took a trip up to mount Saint Baudille earlier today. There's a TV broadcasting tower at the top, and the views are absolutely stunning. You feel like you can see all of France from up there. All pics from this series can be found here.
Indeed, indeed.
Views from the ascent.
Horned cattle.
The TV tower.
Views from the top. Just stunning.
Views from the descent.
Indeed, indeed.
Views from the ascent.
Horned cattle.
The TV tower.
Views from the top. Just stunning.
Views from the descent.
Quote of the Day
Doris: You have no values, your whole life is nihilism, cynicism, sarcasm and orgasm.
Harry: In France I could run on that slogan and win.
- Woody Allen in "Deconstructing Harry"
Harry: In France I could run on that slogan and win.
- Woody Allen in "Deconstructing Harry"
Grotte des Clamouse
Thursday we went to the Grotte de Clamouse, which is just up the road from Pont Diable. Sadly, the experience was somewhat diminished by the guide, who spoke about one sentence of English for every 150 sentences of French. He would go on and on and on about something in French, then at the end say "zis iz very fazinating stone, ok?" or something equally inane. There was also one instance of French arty-fartyness, with a completely uninteresting light show and accompanying music.
The cave itself was interesting and varied, so here are the pics, all of 'em can be found here.
We learned that the white crystals had been made during a cold climate, while most of the colored ones came from periods with a tropical climate.
Yes, these are rock formations. The drops of water inside a stalagtite are sometimes blocked by stone, and then the water will take all sorts of directions, creating the most incredible formations. This is what makes Clamouse special, it has lots of these.
These thin, thin, stones are hollow.
Some forms are... ahem... suggestive...
Robes of rock.
The cave itself was interesting and varied, so here are the pics, all of 'em can be found here.
We learned that the white crystals had been made during a cold climate, while most of the colored ones came from periods with a tropical climate.
Yes, these are rock formations. The drops of water inside a stalagtite are sometimes blocked by stone, and then the water will take all sorts of directions, creating the most incredible formations. This is what makes Clamouse special, it has lots of these.
These thin, thin, stones are hollow.
Some forms are... ahem... suggestive...
Robes of rock.
Grotte des Demoiselles
On Wednesday Nina and I pretty much stumbled over this absofuckinlutely stunning cave in southern France called Grotte des Demoiselles. The name comes from a local legend about how a shepherd fell down the (then) opening and the last thing he saw before he fainted were dancing damsels - demoiselles means maidens.
We had a good time there. The temperature is a cool 14 degrees celcius and the guide spoke some English. We and two Dutch were the only non-French speakers in the group, but he walked with us up front and explained what we were going to see at the next stop, so that when we got there he could talk to the frogs. He took his time, didn't rush anything, and made the whole walk a pleasant experience.
All pics from this cave can be seen here.
Have a good reaction now, you hear! And suggest your neighbors to be vigilant. And English speaking...
The original opening. Nowadays there is a blasted opening with a funicular to take people into the mountain, it was built in the late 20s and early 30s.
The skeleton of a cave bear - ursus spelaeus - was found in the first room of the grotte. There's also a not very convincing copy of one standing in a niche on the funicular ride.
The actual caves. Wow. These rocks have been formed over the span of 150-160 million years. There's not been any new development in the last 10,000 years, because the climate has been too dry. However, the moisture and carbondioxide produced by thousands of visitors every year have given fungus plenty of opportunities to thrive.
Bones of the earth...
Here be dragons...
We had a good time there. The temperature is a cool 14 degrees celcius and the guide spoke some English. We and two Dutch were the only non-French speakers in the group, but he walked with us up front and explained what we were going to see at the next stop, so that when we got there he could talk to the frogs. He took his time, didn't rush anything, and made the whole walk a pleasant experience.
All pics from this cave can be seen here.
Have a good reaction now, you hear! And suggest your neighbors to be vigilant. And English speaking...
The original opening. Nowadays there is a blasted opening with a funicular to take people into the mountain, it was built in the late 20s and early 30s.
The skeleton of a cave bear - ursus spelaeus - was found in the first room of the grotte. There's also a not very convincing copy of one standing in a niche on the funicular ride.
The actual caves. Wow. These rocks have been formed over the span of 150-160 million years. There's not been any new development in the last 10,000 years, because the climate has been too dry. However, the moisture and carbondioxide produced by thousands of visitors every year have given fungus plenty of opportunities to thrive.
Bones of the earth...
Here be dragons...
Saturday, July 24, 2010
Fuck this
I've had a good, long time thinking about this, and I've decided to leave Aniane early. Not one single fucker in this little town speaks passable English, and I can't stomach two weeks without uttering a complete sentence. I'm gonna clean up some stuff and do some laundry, but Monday I am out of here. Fuck this.
Odds and ends
My Norwegian friend Nina came here Tuesday and brightened my day considerably. It was nice to be able to speak in full sentences again... We went for a ride on Wednesday and by sheer dumb luck ended up at one of the world's nicest caves, La Grotte des Demoiselles. Thursday we first went to La Grotte des Camouse then went for a drive around the countryside, all the way down to the coast. I'll post pics of the cave stuff later. She went home to Norway yesterday and I am now looking at two weeks of grunting and pointing at things, maybe with the odd venture into something not wholly unlike French. Sigh. Anyway, here are some odds and ends, photowise.
The sandwich at my regular lunchplace on the esplanade... it's almost as big as my underarm and has a huge slice of cheese running the length of it.
From Lac du Salagou, a lake about 20 mins from Aniane. On the way back we indulged in some milkshake and ice cream at a McDonalds. They had AIR CONDITIONING! *sob*
Wascally wabbits in Saint Guilhem, where we spent some time Wednesday.
This fucker can be seen just about everywhere down here, it almost feels like the American south.
Some bugs we saw on Wednesday. There are a number of things that creep and crawl in these parts, and I want to stomp on them all.
Some nice pics we took at a roadside stop not far from the Grotte des Demoiselles.
The sandwich at my regular lunchplace on the esplanade... it's almost as big as my underarm and has a huge slice of cheese running the length of it.
From Lac du Salagou, a lake about 20 mins from Aniane. On the way back we indulged in some milkshake and ice cream at a McDonalds. They had AIR CONDITIONING! *sob*
Wascally wabbits in Saint Guilhem, where we spent some time Wednesday.
This fucker can be seen just about everywhere down here, it almost feels like the American south.
Some bugs we saw on Wednesday. There are a number of things that creep and crawl in these parts, and I want to stomp on them all.
Some nice pics we took at a roadside stop not far from the Grotte des Demoiselles.
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