What a long, strange trip it was

Aight, biatches! Time for an update from your traveling hero!

Quick recap: I bought a cheap ticket to Los Angeles by way of Philadelphia with US Airways. I'm driving around the western US for 30 days.

First a few words on the flight... The plane was surprisingly small, a regular size thingy with just three seats on each side of the aisle. I'm not sure if it was the pilots or the control tower who fucked up, but we were almost an hour late out of Oslo due to a runway mixup. There was very little entertainment on board - just some TV screens in the ceiling, and you had to pay $5 to get a headset. The movie was called "The Bride Wars" or something equally stupid, and from what I saw I made the right decision by saving my money.

I was initially placed next to a woman with a young kid and a baby who could probably make good money as the next face of Duracell. Some passengers traveling in groups had been scattered all over the plane, and there were several requests for changing seats. I eagerly volunteered to move as the Mother Unit next to me was cranking up the noise level of her little energizer bunny by engaging the little snot magnet in a loud, long game of peekaboo. To my astonishment my wish was granted, but universal balance was seemingly restored when I realized I was being moved to the seat right next to the toilets. This did prove to be a nuisance throughout, but not as bad as I had feared.

Fortunately I was seated next to two nice Norwegian girls in their 20s, who were also on their way to LA for a road trip. They were sadly unprepared for the trip, and with only the vaguest grasp of American geography. Little did they know who they were sitting next to... they soon realized I knew my shit, and were asking me all kinds of stuff and refering to me as their "google". Hero status was sealed when I gave them a couple of chocolates from the mountain I had bought at the airport.

We were worried about making our connecting flight to LA, but things went smooth in Philly and we actually landed at LAX 40 minutes early, wheeeeeeeee! On a side note, I should like to state that I can't understand those who bitch and complain about how terrible procedures have become in the US after 9/11. I've traveled here three times since then and Immigration and Customs officers have been nothing but polite, friendly and efficient. The guys at Philly were very nice, and we had a brief but fun chat during the procedures.

Sadly, the time gained at LAX was lost again at Dollar (the rental car company), where using the term "glacial speed" for comparison would be a libelous insult to glaciers. The original car I'd booked from Norway did not have cruise control and automatic transmission, and the upgrade, with taxes, cost me something like $280. In addition something so basic as 24 hour road assistance was an extra, which I chose not to take. There was something amateurish about the whole operation, and this will be the last time ever that I rent from Dollar, and it will be the last time ever that I rent through a Norwegian intermediary.