Wealth I ask not, hope nor love
Nor a friend to know me
All I seek, the heaven above
And the road below me.
- Robert Louis Stevenson
Happy New Year, fans!
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
I'm first! Me, me me!
An historical event happened at the airport today. I was the first to check in! When I arrived the Wizz Air counter hadn't opened yet, so I hung around, lurking in the shadows. When a middleaged woman walked up to an empty counter and started punching in on the computer, I made an educated guess and got in line. Lo and behold, it was Wizz Air and yours truly made it as numero uno. Wheee!
Also, this free internet thingy they have at the airport is pretty nifty - I'm typing these words at a cafe table in the terminal. It's just too stupid that you normally have to pay through the nose for something that ought to be normal courtesy in 2009 for any business of size & repute. Hrmph.
Lest I jinx this trip, let me close by cursing the effin parking house at the airport. Since it's bloody cold and there's lots of snow all over, I thought I'd splurge and park indoors. The sign outside the parking house said there were still a few open spots, so I drove in. Sadly there was not a fuckin space to be fuckin had on account of all the fuckin cunts doubleparked liked fuckin twats all over the fuckin place. I had to park way the fuck up at the back of the outdoors area and drag my way through the snow to the terminal. Curses.
Also, this free internet thingy they have at the airport is pretty nifty - I'm typing these words at a cafe table in the terminal. It's just too stupid that you normally have to pay through the nose for something that ought to be normal courtesy in 2009 for any business of size & repute. Hrmph.
Lest I jinx this trip, let me close by cursing the effin parking house at the airport. Since it's bloody cold and there's lots of snow all over, I thought I'd splurge and park indoors. The sign outside the parking house said there were still a few open spots, so I drove in. Sadly there was not a fuckin space to be fuckin had on account of all the fuckin cunts doubleparked liked fuckin twats all over the fuckin place. I had to park way the fuck up at the back of the outdoors area and drag my way through the snow to the terminal. Curses.
Quote of the Day
I'm off to Prague in a few minutes... smell ya later!
Every revolution evaporates and leaves behind only the slime of a new bureaucracy.
- Franz Kafka
Every revolution evaporates and leaves behind only the slime of a new bureaucracy.
- Franz Kafka
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
London IV
I spent a few happy hours at the Imperial War Museum yesterday, as my flight didn't leave until the evening. The museum has a magnificent audio guide and I highly recommend it (£3.50). The main hall has various assorted goodies, there's a submarine expo (mainly for children, which means I loved it), there's a WW1 and WW2 exhibit and also a little tribute to Monty - Bernard Montgomery, the Field Marshal who turned the tide of the war at El Alamein. The man was stark raving mad in some respects, but a brilliant leader of soldiers.
Another exhibition I spent some time at was titled "The Children's War" and focused on the war experience through the eyes of children. An essential element was the relocation of tens of thousands of children from the major cities to the countryside, and even to other English-speaking nations. The experience was diverse in the extreme. Some were poor, dirty, uneducated, often came from homes were abuse was common - and they came to the rich English countryside with space, fresh air, good material living - a long, blissful holiday, really. Others came from good homes and were treated badly - "a rotting matress in a room filled with rat droppings" was one line I remember. Often, children who returned home didn't recognize their parents. Some were sent overseas to South Africa, Canada and the US. As the exhibition makes clear, not all ships made it - some were sunk by submarines. There were also tons of info on everything from school to play, clothes, food, propaganda posters, etc, and of course lots and lots of old pictures (which I love). Highly recommended.
The V-2 and a Russian T-34. Piece of junk made by the Czechs in '55, captured by the Israelis, no doubt never fired a shot. Hehe.
The Sherman tank. Not the best, but easily mass produced by the allies.
Little Boy, the Hiroshima nuke. Sweet Jesus, I was tempted to sneak up behind the Asian guy and pop a paper bag.
Propaganda posters from the Children's War exhibition.
See here, children actually had to fuckin' WORK!
All pics here.
Another exhibition I spent some time at was titled "The Children's War" and focused on the war experience through the eyes of children. An essential element was the relocation of tens of thousands of children from the major cities to the countryside, and even to other English-speaking nations. The experience was diverse in the extreme. Some were poor, dirty, uneducated, often came from homes were abuse was common - and they came to the rich English countryside with space, fresh air, good material living - a long, blissful holiday, really. Others came from good homes and were treated badly - "a rotting matress in a room filled with rat droppings" was one line I remember. Often, children who returned home didn't recognize their parents. Some were sent overseas to South Africa, Canada and the US. As the exhibition makes clear, not all ships made it - some were sunk by submarines. There were also tons of info on everything from school to play, clothes, food, propaganda posters, etc, and of course lots and lots of old pictures (which I love). Highly recommended.
The V-2 and a Russian T-34. Piece of junk made by the Czechs in '55, captured by the Israelis, no doubt never fired a shot. Hehe.
The Sherman tank. Not the best, but easily mass produced by the allies.
Little Boy, the Hiroshima nuke. Sweet Jesus, I was tempted to sneak up behind the Asian guy and pop a paper bag.
Propaganda posters from the Children's War exhibition.
See here, children actually had to fuckin' WORK!
All pics here.
Quote of the Day
Drive-in banks were established so most of the cars today could see their real owners.
- E. Joseph Cossman
- E. Joseph Cossman
Monday, December 28, 2009
Quote of the Day
School teachers, taking them by and large, are probably the most ignorant and stupid class of men in the whole group of mental workers.
- H. L. Mencken
- H. L. Mencken
Sunday, December 27, 2009
London III
Christmas Day I spent two hours on a brisk walk through the center of London, on a "London Walks" tour called "Samuel Pepys' London". We met in Trafalgar Square, by the Norwegian Christmas tree. The rest of the day as well as all of Saturday I spent in my room, except for brief forays to hunt down food (there's an Indian restaurant round one corner and a McDonalds around the other).
Today I've spent a few delicious hours at the National Gallery, then I went and saw Sherlock Holmes at a theatre in Leicester Square. It sucked. Not hard, but not worth the time and money either. The worst part is, they show scenes in the trailer that isn't even in the fuckin' movie and that pisses me off.
On the bright side, things have picked up at the hotel. The room is tiny, but since the plumber came on Wednesday the water in the shower has been ok and I think I might stay here again next time I'm in London. It's difficult finding decent, cheap accomodation in this city but this is as close as I've ever come.
The Christmas Tree in Trafalgar Square and the placard accompanying it:
The obscenely good dessert at the Ciao cafe...
Today I've spent a few delicious hours at the National Gallery, then I went and saw Sherlock Holmes at a theatre in Leicester Square. It sucked. Not hard, but not worth the time and money either. The worst part is, they show scenes in the trailer that isn't even in the fuckin' movie and that pisses me off.
On the bright side, things have picked up at the hotel. The room is tiny, but since the plumber came on Wednesday the water in the shower has been ok and I think I might stay here again next time I'm in London. It's difficult finding decent, cheap accomodation in this city but this is as close as I've ever come.
The Christmas Tree in Trafalgar Square and the placard accompanying it:
The obscenely good dessert at the Ciao cafe...
Quote of the Day
The men who try to do something and fail are infinitely better than those who try to do nothing and succeed.
- Lloyd Jones
- Lloyd Jones
Saturday, December 26, 2009
Quote of the Day
Poetry is a deal of joy and pain and wonder, with a dash of the dictionary.
- Kahlil Gibran
- Kahlil Gibran
Friday, December 25, 2009
Quote of the Day
Hell is an outrage on humanity. When you tell me that your deity made you in his image, I reply that he must have been very ugly.
- Victor Hugo
- Victor Hugo
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Quote of the Day
I find that we all get more legendary as time goes by. "Legend" means, basically, "bullshit".
- Joel Rosenberg
- Joel Rosenberg
London II
Today I spent a few lazy, pleasurable hours at the Natural History Museum, mainly looking at DINOSAURS cuz they're COOL. Also looked at the mammals section.
Then I went back to the hotel for a little rest - such as could be had when there was a plumber fixing stuff and a receptionist knockin over the cupboard so it fell on the bed (good thing I wasn't on it). Hrmph.
In the evening I had a highly (lowly? middling?) mediocre dinner at Garfunkels, then popped next door to The Dominion and saw the musical "We will rock you". Great show, great cast, great tunes.
Then I went back to the hotel for a little rest - such as could be had when there was a plumber fixing stuff and a receptionist knockin over the cupboard so it fell on the bed (good thing I wasn't on it). Hrmph.
In the evening I had a highly (lowly? middling?) mediocre dinner at Garfunkels, then popped next door to The Dominion and saw the musical "We will rock you". Great show, great cast, great tunes.
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Quote of the Day
Happiness: An agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another.
- Ambrose Bierce
- Ambrose Bierce
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
London I
The flight over yesterday was pure hell. We first sat for almost three hours on the tarmac in Oslo, waiting for fuckin Gatwick to fuckin open. Then my hotel turned out to be a cramped little hole, where the water in the shower really came with only one option: Scalding hot.
Today has picked up considerably. I first went and spent some wonderful hours at the National Portrait Gallery, this time mainly the Victorians. Then I had a good lunch at the Ciao, the Italian cafe behind the gallery. In the evening I went out to Hammersmith and saw Jimmy Carr savage a couple of hecklers (he did a lot of other stuff too, but the hecklers were the best part).
Today has picked up considerably. I first went and spent some wonderful hours at the National Portrait Gallery, this time mainly the Victorians. Then I had a good lunch at the Ciao, the Italian cafe behind the gallery. In the evening I went out to Hammersmith and saw Jimmy Carr savage a couple of hecklers (he did a lot of other stuff too, but the hecklers were the best part).
Quote of the Day
This world is a comedy to those that think, a tragedy to those that feel.
- Horace Walpole
- Horace Walpole
Monday, December 21, 2009
Numbers
This morning I weighed in at 115,5 kg - down 0,6 kg in a week. I still rock, but I fear what will happen during my upcoming 8 days in London. I'm bringing one manual with me and I intend to walk to my greedy little heart's desire, but the food is also very, very good in that city... sigh.
Quote of the Day
I'm off to London today. Buh-bye!
If it doesn't burn fuel or make a lot of noise, what good is it?
- Jim Byers
If it doesn't burn fuel or make a lot of noise, what good is it?
- Jim Byers
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Quote of the Day
Eternal damnation awaits anyone who questions God's unconditional love.
- Bill Hicks
- Bill Hicks
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Happy Festivus
Soon (Dec 23) we shall enter that joyful holiday, Festivus - the holiday for the rest of us. As usual I don't give a flying fuck about Christmas, seasonal greetings, presents and decorations and intend to spend the day watching DVDs and maybe working out once or twice. But this year I thought I'd give Festivus a shot, more specifically the "airing of grievances". This is where I let you all know how much you've disappointed me over the past 12 months. Here goes:
- My family. You still haven't become rich and died, leaving me a vast fortune to squander as I please. I shall never forgive you.
- My colleagues. I have a stroke, and all you guys can think of is joking about my loss of a driver's license for two months! You've been mean to me, and one day I will come with a shotgun and explain to you exactly how I feel.
- My pupils. Dumb, ignorant, uninterested, ungrateful little bastards you are! Whining just because you have to interpret an English poem or write an essay of more than two paragraphs. Also, the next one of you to spell "with" as "whit" will have your fingers cut off.
- The CIA. You fuckers STILL haven't passed me a suitcase full of unmarked 20-dollar bills, despite all I've done for you. I'm giving fair warning, if an offer comes from the Russkies, I'll contemplate it.
- Mossad. I keep defending Israel, and you kikes STILL haven't given me a pair of über-cool sunglasses and a set of super secretive assassination weapons to use on my pupils. I'm warming to the Arabs is all I can say.
- My family. You still haven't become rich and died, leaving me a vast fortune to squander as I please. I shall never forgive you.
- My colleagues. I have a stroke, and all you guys can think of is joking about my loss of a driver's license for two months! You've been mean to me, and one day I will come with a shotgun and explain to you exactly how I feel.
- My pupils. Dumb, ignorant, uninterested, ungrateful little bastards you are! Whining just because you have to interpret an English poem or write an essay of more than two paragraphs. Also, the next one of you to spell "with" as "whit" will have your fingers cut off.
- The CIA. You fuckers STILL haven't passed me a suitcase full of unmarked 20-dollar bills, despite all I've done for you. I'm giving fair warning, if an offer comes from the Russkies, I'll contemplate it.
- Mossad. I keep defending Israel, and you kikes STILL haven't given me a pair of über-cool sunglasses and a set of super secretive assassination weapons to use on my pupils. I'm warming to the Arabs is all I can say.
- My readers. You've not kept up the pressure in the comments section on my exercising scheme. I had to go ahead and have a STROKE before I started losing weight. I'm sorely disappointed in you, I had expected better (=worse).
- Barack Obama. Nuff said.
Friday, December 18, 2009
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Quote of the Day
The only thing necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing.
- Edmund Burke
- Edmund Burke
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Up, up and awaaaaaay
I've done it again. I've gone and challenged fate by purchasing a trip to England Dec 21-28. Bet I'll be coming down with swine flu on Sunday evening... I'm flying to Gatwick with Norwegian Air and planning on a week's quick trip to see the sights of southeastern England - Surrey, Kent, West Sussex, East Sussex and possibly Hampshire and the Isle of Wight.
Then on to Prague from Torp Airport in the south on Wednesday the 30th...
Update Thursday: Meh. All of Southeast England is CLOSED for Christmas, so I'm taking a week in London instead.
Then on to Prague from Torp Airport in the south on Wednesday the 30th...
Update Thursday: Meh. All of Southeast England is CLOSED for Christmas, so I'm taking a week in London instead.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Quote of the Day
"There's someone out there for everyone - even if you need a pickaxe, a compass, and night goggles to find them."
- Steve Martin in "LA Story"
- Steve Martin in "LA Story"
Monday, December 14, 2009
Sunday, December 13, 2009
Idiocy all round
A new study by PEW shows that Democrats, even more so than their supposedly more religious counterparts the Republicans, are braindead. The prevalence of ghosts, fortunetellers, communicating with the dead and other such rubbish is about twice as high amongst Democrats as Republicans.
Not surprisingly, "women are also twice as likely to have consulted a fortuneteller or psychic". This fits with personal experience, which is that women are more into fuzzy, feel-good, new age drivel, while men go more for the institutionalized, impersonal major religions. Regardless, it is a sad fact that Democrats, albeit perceived as more "secular" in their policies, are at least as irrational, ignorant and just plain DUMB as the Republicans in their world view.
Not surprisingly, "women are also twice as likely to have consulted a fortuneteller or psychic". This fits with personal experience, which is that women are more into fuzzy, feel-good, new age drivel, while men go more for the institutionalized, impersonal major religions. Regardless, it is a sad fact that Democrats, albeit perceived as more "secular" in their policies, are at least as irrational, ignorant and just plain DUMB as the Republicans in their world view.
Quote of the Day
Be not too hasty to trust or admire the teachers of morality; they discourse like angels, but they live like men.
- Samuel Johnson
- Samuel Johnson
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Quote of the Day
"Truth hurts. Maybe not as much as jumping on a bicycle with a seat missing, but it hurts."
- Leslie Nilsen in "Naked Gun 2 1/2"
- Leslie Nilsen in "Naked Gun 2 1/2"
Friday, December 11, 2009
Quote of the Day
Early in life I had to choose between honest arrogance and hypocritical humility. I chose the former and have seen no reason to change.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Quote of the Day
The greatest thing in the world is to know how to be self-sufficient.
- Michel De Montaigne
- Michel De Montaigne
Monday, December 7, 2009
Quote of the Day
The successful revolutionary is a statesman, the unsuccessful one a criminal.
- Erich Fromm
- Erich Fromm
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Quote of the Day
Little prigs and three-quarter madmen may have the conceit that the laws of nature are constantly broken for their sakes.
- Friedrich Nietzsche, on prayer
- Friedrich Nietzsche, on prayer
Saturday, December 5, 2009
Friday, December 4, 2009
I can fly, I can fly, I can flyyyyyyy
Well, not really. But I can DRIVE again! Since my last trip to the hospital on September 29, I have had a ban on driving. Today I finally had a test of my cognitive abilites and I completely and utterly aced it. I circled the right numbers, I put the right pics in the right place and so on and so forth. No more buses, no more driving with family members, and most important of all: No more harassment from colleagues! Wheeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Quote of the Day
The longer I live the more I see that I am never wrong about anything, and that all the pains that I have so humbly taken to verify my notions have only wasted my time.
- George Bernhard Shaw
- George Bernhard Shaw
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Quote of the Day
When action grows unprofitable, gather information; when information grows unprofitable, sleep.
- Ursula LeGuin
- Ursula LeGuin
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Quote of the Day
The market is not an invention of capitalism. It has existed for centuries. It is an invention of civilization.
- Mikhail Gorbachev
- Mikhail Gorbachev
Monday, November 30, 2009
Numbers
This morning I weighed in at 118,7 kg, down 0,8 kg in a week. Considering that last week contained Thanksgiving and that I (as usual) stuffed my face on goble-goble and associated delicacies, this loss of weight is very good.
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Things that make my head go "pop"
Every now and then I come across an article about something so stupid, evil or just plain dumb that it's all I can do not no let my brain explode. In this category neatly falls this article from The Telegraph:
"Pirates terrorising ships in the Indian Ocean, looting and taking hostages, are often given medical checks and fed after being caught, before being sent of their way.
This is also sometimes because although they are carrying guns and other weapons, they have not been caught in the act of piracy and therefore have not technically committed a crime.
More than 340 suspected Somalian pirates have been captured by international naval forces in the last year and subsequently released on the advice of lawyers."
There is an old, proven way of dealing with pirates. It has served the various navies of hundreds of different nations well over the centuries, to the point where it could be claimed to be a custom, nay tradition: HANGING.
There is no earthly reason why any Somali ship's crew should be caught offshore with anything more harmful than a wooden fork in their possession. There is certainly no reason why possessing anything more harmful should lead to an application for asylum, much less the granting of said asylum. This practice of cuddling pirates is just one of the more insane manifestations of our current "humanitarian" policy towards evildoers of all stripes, nationalities and religions (there seems to be a bias in favor of muslims, although that might be just a sample bias if you get my drift).
Hoisting the bastards from the mast would surely send the right signal to other would-be pirates to leave our ships the fuck alone, as would any serious naval effort to blow the scum out of the water. What we're currently doing is insanity, of the liberal kind. We're concerned with human rights and international law, when what's needed is for the civilized world to use its overwhelming military superiority to kill these fuckers and kill them dead.
"Pirates terrorising ships in the Indian Ocean, looting and taking hostages, are often given medical checks and fed after being caught, before being sent of their way.
This is also sometimes because although they are carrying guns and other weapons, they have not been caught in the act of piracy and therefore have not technically committed a crime.
More than 340 suspected Somalian pirates have been captured by international naval forces in the last year and subsequently released on the advice of lawyers."
There is an old, proven way of dealing with pirates. It has served the various navies of hundreds of different nations well over the centuries, to the point where it could be claimed to be a custom, nay tradition: HANGING.
There is no earthly reason why any Somali ship's crew should be caught offshore with anything more harmful than a wooden fork in their possession. There is certainly no reason why possessing anything more harmful should lead to an application for asylum, much less the granting of said asylum. This practice of cuddling pirates is just one of the more insane manifestations of our current "humanitarian" policy towards evildoers of all stripes, nationalities and religions (there seems to be a bias in favor of muslims, although that might be just a sample bias if you get my drift).
Hoisting the bastards from the mast would surely send the right signal to other would-be pirates to leave our ships the fuck alone, as would any serious naval effort to blow the scum out of the water. What we're currently doing is insanity, of the liberal kind. We're concerned with human rights and international law, when what's needed is for the civilized world to use its overwhelming military superiority to kill these fuckers and kill them dead.
Quote of the Day
I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.
- Steve Martin
- Steve Martin
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Friday, November 27, 2009
Thursday, November 26, 2009
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Quote of the Day
The dumber people are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them.
- William Clayton
- William Clayton
Monday, November 23, 2009
Numbers
I was 119,5 kg this morning. This is the first time since early April that I've been under 120. For the past two weeks I've been exercising - on the bike, some other exercises, 2 kilo weights - taking it slow and easy but at least getting some every day. I've actually been eating quite well, but this exercise regime has worked wonders for my blood sugar levels and digestion.
Quote of the Day
If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer.
- Alfred Whitehead
- Alfred Whitehead
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Quote of the Day
I have encountered a few "creationists" and because they were usually nice, intelligent people, I have been unable to decide whether they were really mad, or only pretending to be mad. If I was a religious person, I would consider creationism nothing less than blasphemy. Do its adherents imagine that God is a cosmic hoaxer who has created that whole vast fossil record for the sole purpose of misleading mankind?
- Arthur C. Clarke
- Arthur C. Clarke
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Quote of the Day
When a true genius appears in the world you may know him by this sign that the dunces are all in confederacy against him.
- Jonathan Swift
- Jonathan Swift
Friday, November 20, 2009
Quote of the Day
Man is quite insane. He wouldn't know how to create a maggot, and he creates Gods by the dozen.
- Michel De Montaigne
- Michel De Montaigne
Fuckin eejits
I don't normally critizise Norwegian affairs on this blog, since most of my readers are Americans, but the development in the Norwegian monarchy these last few weeks has been so appaling I can't keep quiet anymore.
The royal princess, Martha Louise is... how should I put this delicately...
A stark, raving nutter? No, that doesn't do her justice.
A dumb cunt unable to grasp the most basic tenets of science and critical thought? Closer, but still not adequate.
A fucking dimwit, propagating the worst sort of pseudo-religious drivel known to man? Yeah, that just about covers it.
The royal princess made headlines a few years back when she started an "angel school", teaching people to commune with their guardian angels. Now she's co-written a book on the subject, which includes ignorant, dangerous, anti-scientific rubbish like reading auras, healing crystals, other dimensions and of course talking to angels.
Naturally the princess has gotten some bad press, one professor called the book "a solid helping of spiritual quackery". That hasn't stopped it from selling. The publishing house Cappelen Damm, who is putting profits over intelligence is already printing its second edition.
Now, I have a few thoughts about what to make of it all. First and foremost, this is the final nail in the coffin of the monarchy. Norway in 2009 may have a ruling family consisting of a dimwitted crown prince with an uneducated, drug using single mother for his wife, but can we have a princess who is clearly a fuckin eejit? I think not. Let the monarchy die out with the current king and let his braindead offspring WORK for a living.
Secondly, we need to take a long and hard look at our schools. Children now leave after ten years of compulsory education without a basic knowledge of science and critical thinking. We need to give priority to science and to introduce scientific thinking into every aspect of education. We must also abolish the state church and stop teaching religious bullshit in schools. (Notice I don't say we should stop learning about religion as it pertains to culture. It is impossible to read and understand anything of western literature without a basic grasp of our history of ideas.)
Thirdly, we need to do something about the media. They now print any bullshit if they think it'll sell - ghosts, angels, healing, alternative medisin. Editors who are caught printing an uncritical story about the "supernatural" or "alternative" will be hung from the nearest lamppost. This should lead to the shutting down of most women's mags and a radical thinning of most newspapers.
Lastly, we need to start a... for lack of a better word... crusade against stupid, uncritical thinking. The poor, sad fuckers who spout this crap can be divided into two categories: Idiots and con men. The idiots must be educated in science and taught the errors of their ways. If this doesn't succeed they should at least be forced to shut their fuckin' traps and not bother other people. The con men should be shot point blank in the head, and their families billed for the cost of ammo, Chinese style.
The royal princess, Martha Louise is... how should I put this delicately...
A stark, raving nutter? No, that doesn't do her justice.
A dumb cunt unable to grasp the most basic tenets of science and critical thought? Closer, but still not adequate.
A fucking dimwit, propagating the worst sort of pseudo-religious drivel known to man? Yeah, that just about covers it.
The royal princess made headlines a few years back when she started an "angel school", teaching people to commune with their guardian angels. Now she's co-written a book on the subject, which includes ignorant, dangerous, anti-scientific rubbish like reading auras, healing crystals, other dimensions and of course talking to angels.
Naturally the princess has gotten some bad press, one professor called the book "a solid helping of spiritual quackery". That hasn't stopped it from selling. The publishing house Cappelen Damm, who is putting profits over intelligence is already printing its second edition.
Now, I have a few thoughts about what to make of it all. First and foremost, this is the final nail in the coffin of the monarchy. Norway in 2009 may have a ruling family consisting of a dimwitted crown prince with an uneducated, drug using single mother for his wife, but can we have a princess who is clearly a fuckin eejit? I think not. Let the monarchy die out with the current king and let his braindead offspring WORK for a living.
Secondly, we need to take a long and hard look at our schools. Children now leave after ten years of compulsory education without a basic knowledge of science and critical thinking. We need to give priority to science and to introduce scientific thinking into every aspect of education. We must also abolish the state church and stop teaching religious bullshit in schools. (Notice I don't say we should stop learning about religion as it pertains to culture. It is impossible to read and understand anything of western literature without a basic grasp of our history of ideas.)
Thirdly, we need to do something about the media. They now print any bullshit if they think it'll sell - ghosts, angels, healing, alternative medisin. Editors who are caught printing an uncritical story about the "supernatural" or "alternative" will be hung from the nearest lamppost. This should lead to the shutting down of most women's mags and a radical thinning of most newspapers.
Lastly, we need to start a... for lack of a better word... crusade against stupid, uncritical thinking. The poor, sad fuckers who spout this crap can be divided into two categories: Idiots and con men. The idiots must be educated in science and taught the errors of their ways. If this doesn't succeed they should at least be forced to shut their fuckin' traps and not bother other people. The con men should be shot point blank in the head, and their families billed for the cost of ammo, Chinese style.
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Fuck the French
The fuckin' French have made it to the 2010 World Cup in South Africa, knocking out Ireland. The final goal came in the overtime period and was the direct result of a HANDS by French forward Thierry Henry. The French, being by nature cowardly, thieving, lying motherfuckers didn't own up and thus won by cheating.
FUCKERS! FUCKERS! FUCKERS!
/rant
FUCKERS! FUCKERS! FUCKERS!
/rant
Quote of the Day
Women have a wonderful instinct about things. They can discover everything except the obvious.
- Oscar Wilde
- Oscar Wilde
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Quote of the Day
This is the hardest of all: to close the open hand out of love, and keep modest as a giver.
- Friedrich Nietzsche
- Friedrich Nietzsche
Monday, November 16, 2009
Quote of the Day
Basically my wife was immature. I’d be at home in the bath and she’d come in and sink my boats.
- Woody Allen
- Woody Allen
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Quote of the Day
You never see animals going through the absurd and often horrible fooleries of magic and religion. Only man behaves with such gratuitous folly. It is the price he has to pay for being intelligent but not, as yet, intelligent enough.
- Aldous Huxley
- Aldous Huxley
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Quote of the Day
I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.
- Winston Churchill
- Winston Churchill
Friday, November 13, 2009
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Quote of the Day
Man is descended from a hairy, tailed quadruped, probably arboreal in its habits.
- Charles Darwin
- Charles Darwin
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Soldiers' Angels
I've plugged anysoldier.com earlier, now I'm plugging soldiersangels.org. You can adopt a soldier, support their families at home, send care packages, etc, etc. You can even care for military dogs, how cool is that? It's nearing Christmas and although I don't do that particular "holiday", I know most of you do. So how 'bout breaking out yer wallets and donate a few bucks, m'kay?
Monday, November 9, 2009
Quote of the Day
Man does not live by words alone, despite the fact that sometimes he has to eat them.
- Adlai Stephenson
- Adlai Stephenson
Sunday, November 8, 2009
Quote of the Day
I finally know what distinguishes man from other beasts: financial worries.
- Jules Renard
- Jules Renard
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Random blogs
I've run a post on this before... sometimes when I'm bored enough I avail myself of the "next blog" button at the top and just go around cruising for some random amusement. Sadly I mostly end up with Asian teens, American religious nutcases and Spanish artists. Ugh.
Still dear reader, I trudge on through the mud and the foreign rubbish and the nutty ideas to find the few little specks of gold out so that you don't have to. Without further ado I present to you:
* Nell's Big Walk - A blog by an Irish woman walking through Spain. Lots of nice pics.
* There is a Pug in the House - A blog about a cute little pup. Awwwwwwwww.
* Pork & Chocolate - A food lover's guide to New York.
* The Burger Beast - Tons of greasy, fatty, yummy food. Based in Southern Florida, but with reviews from all over.
Still dear reader, I trudge on through the mud and the foreign rubbish and the nutty ideas to find the few little specks of gold out so that you don't have to. Without further ado I present to you:
* Nell's Big Walk - A blog by an Irish woman walking through Spain. Lots of nice pics.
* There is a Pug in the House - A blog about a cute little pup. Awwwwwwwww.
* Pork & Chocolate - A food lover's guide to New York.
* The Burger Beast - Tons of greasy, fatty, yummy food. Based in Southern Florida, but with reviews from all over.
Friday, November 6, 2009
Kill 'em all
Lebanese terrorist scumbags Hezbollah are trying to ban a new translation of Anne Frank's diary:
"The Hezbollah-owned Al-Manar TV last week called on Lebanese judicial authorities to prosecute those responsible for the distribution of the book here, blasting its theatrical and dramatic narration in an emotional way."
These fuckers are not just trying to ban books, but are also Holocaust-deniers (while at the same time praising Hitler for Holocaust... no, logic is not their strong suite). Hezbollah holds 11 seats in the 128 member Lebanese parliament.
Just yesterday the news broke that an Iranian ship carrying 500 tons of weaponry meant for Hezbollah had been taken into Israeli custody. If these weapons weren't for use against Israel they would be used against other Lebanese, to further Hezbollah's terror reign in southern Lebanon.
To me it is mindblowing that the US (and Israel) doesn't react to these news. The US has enough firepower on an aircraft carrier group to level Lebanon, and Israel, now that they are again run by an ex-military and not a corrupt cunt can and should commence operations to clear the fuckers out once and for all. If necessary, they should create a barren wasteland, a real buffer zone on the border - wide enough that various Russian made artillery and rockets can't reach Israel proper. If that extends the zone to the Bekaa valley, so be it.
"The Hezbollah-owned Al-Manar TV last week called on Lebanese judicial authorities to prosecute those responsible for the distribution of the book here, blasting its theatrical and dramatic narration in an emotional way."
These fuckers are not just trying to ban books, but are also Holocaust-deniers (while at the same time praising Hitler for Holocaust... no, logic is not their strong suite). Hezbollah holds 11 seats in the 128 member Lebanese parliament.
Just yesterday the news broke that an Iranian ship carrying 500 tons of weaponry meant for Hezbollah had been taken into Israeli custody. If these weapons weren't for use against Israel they would be used against other Lebanese, to further Hezbollah's terror reign in southern Lebanon.
To me it is mindblowing that the US (and Israel) doesn't react to these news. The US has enough firepower on an aircraft carrier group to level Lebanon, and Israel, now that they are again run by an ex-military and not a corrupt cunt can and should commence operations to clear the fuckers out once and for all. If necessary, they should create a barren wasteland, a real buffer zone on the border - wide enough that various Russian made artillery and rockets can't reach Israel proper. If that extends the zone to the Bekaa valley, so be it.
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
How I Beat The Man
I've just recieved word from the US that my parking citation of $330 from this summer has been rescinded. I was parked in a handicap space, outside a handicap room I had booked, on what I thought was Motel 6 property. The city of Chula Vista (a suburb to San Diego) slapped me with a fine for standing in a handicap space without a valid permit.
I complained, arguing that:
1) I was staying legally in a handicap room. Although I wasn't technically handicapped, I do have a cranky leg with a thrombosis from the diabetes and have found it useful to stay in such rooms.
2) The parking space was right outside my room.
3) I had no reason to think the parking lot wasn't private, hotel property.
4) I had a valid parking permit from the hotel.
5) I would never, ever, EVER park in a handicap space on a public street. I can walk just fine. But when I'm using the handicap ROOM I might as well use the handicap SPACE right outside it.
Today I got a letter saying my complaint had been reviewed and the citation was rescinded. $330 saved and a rare victory for common sense.
I complained, arguing that:
1) I was staying legally in a handicap room. Although I wasn't technically handicapped, I do have a cranky leg with a thrombosis from the diabetes and have found it useful to stay in such rooms.
2) The parking space was right outside my room.
3) I had no reason to think the parking lot wasn't private, hotel property.
4) I had a valid parking permit from the hotel.
5) I would never, ever, EVER park in a handicap space on a public street. I can walk just fine. But when I'm using the handicap ROOM I might as well use the handicap SPACE right outside it.
Today I got a letter saying my complaint had been reviewed and the citation was rescinded. $330 saved and a rare victory for common sense.
Monday, November 2, 2009
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Wheeeeeeeeee
My hometown team has just won admission to the premier league of Norway's soccer system! They played 0-0 in the final game, but that was enough to become number 2 in the 2nd division and winning the promotion. Wheeeeeeeeeeee!
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Friday, October 30, 2009
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Quote of the Day
If a person feels he can't communicate, the least he can do is shut up about it.
- Tom Lehrer
- Tom Lehrer
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Quote of the Day
Let everyone sweep in front of his own door, and the whole world will be clean.
- Goethe
- Goethe
Monday, October 26, 2009
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Saturday, October 24, 2009
New favorite artist
Those who know me, will know that I have a deep loathing for 99% of modern music. Rap, synth, hip-hop, techno and the ghastly R&B which contains neither rythm nor blues, but is a catch-all phrase for all kinds of wailing and hollering - I hate it all.
I must admit to being a bit behind the times so to speak. I almost never listen to the radio (I actively turn off music programs) and whenever I watch music on TV it's usually late night classic VH1, where one can be reasonably certain of shelter from modern crap. So imagine my surprise and delight at discovering a fine, young artist who came out with an album as recently as 2007: Amy Mcdonald. Yes, dear reader(s), a mere two years after the release of her first album, I heard one of her songs! Wheeeeee! It was "Mr Rock & Roll" (I wish I knew you before), and the guitar and the singing was spot on - proper, melodic, guitarbased music.
I have since downloaded a few more songs and they're all fuckin' brilliant (I have a vague recollection of having heard "This is the life" before and liking it); this is the kind of music I would be playing if I could play so to speak... She's Scottish (another plus) but sings with something of an Irish accent (wheee!) and eternal love was sealed when I discovered she sang "Caledonia" as a hidden track on her CD. Go ye out and buy, buy, buy if you don't already have. I know I will as soon as I can get to an effin music store (I'm still not allowed to drive due to the stroke).
I must admit to being a bit behind the times so to speak. I almost never listen to the radio (I actively turn off music programs) and whenever I watch music on TV it's usually late night classic VH1, where one can be reasonably certain of shelter from modern crap. So imagine my surprise and delight at discovering a fine, young artist who came out with an album as recently as 2007: Amy Mcdonald. Yes, dear reader(s), a mere two years after the release of her first album, I heard one of her songs! Wheeeeee! It was "Mr Rock & Roll" (I wish I knew you before), and the guitar and the singing was spot on - proper, melodic, guitarbased music.
I have since downloaded a few more songs and they're all fuckin' brilliant (I have a vague recollection of having heard "This is the life" before and liking it); this is the kind of music I would be playing if I could play so to speak... She's Scottish (another plus) but sings with something of an Irish accent (wheee!) and eternal love was sealed when I discovered she sang "Caledonia" as a hidden track on her CD. Go ye out and buy, buy, buy if you don't already have. I know I will as soon as I can get to an effin music store (I'm still not allowed to drive due to the stroke).
Friday, October 23, 2009
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Quote of the Day
Good executives never put off until tomorrow what they can get someone else to do today.
- John Maxwell
- John Maxwell
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Quote of the Day
A deadline is negative inspiration. Still, it's better than no inspiration at all.
- Rita Mae Brown
- Rita Mae Brown
Monday, October 19, 2009
Quote of the Day
Education is when you read the fine print. Experience is what you get if you don't.
- Pete Seeger
- Pete Seeger
Band of brothers
I saw Band of Brothers for the second time Sunday and today (I have A LOT of spare time, I'm still on sick leave) and it was even better than the first time. Especially the interviews with the remaining few of the original gang are moving to watch. The second world war was the last undeniably "good" war, the last in which there was a good and a bad side for all to see. Now there's all sorts of nuance and gray areas and conspiracy theories and media made ambiguity. Honestly, if the situation arose, I'm not sure most of western Europe could fight anymore, or at least would want to.
The men of Easy company on the other hand, simply did their job. 65 years later we're still in their debt, still thankful for their sacrifice. CURRAHEE.
The men of Easy company on the other hand, simply did their job. 65 years later we're still in their debt, still thankful for their sacrifice. CURRAHEE.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Friday, October 16, 2009
Quote of the Day
A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.
- Helen Rowland
- Helen Rowland
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Quote of the Day
The cat could very well be man's best friend, but would never stoop to admitting it.
- Doug Larson
- Doug Larson
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Quote of the Day
It often takes more courage to change one's opinion than to stick to it.
- Geoffrey Abert
- Geoffrey Abert
Monday, October 12, 2009
Numbers
As of Monday I weigh exactly 122 kg. I am using this opportunity to try and lose a few pounds, now that I am at home for a month and can control my eating regime. My blood sugar has been really fine, too.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Quote of the Day
Timid men prefer the calm of despotism to the boisterous sea of liberty.
- Thomas Jefferson
- Thomas Jefferson
Friday, October 9, 2009
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Quote of the Day
A healthy male adult bore consumes each year one and a half times his own weight in other people's patience.
- John Updike
- John Updike
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Quote of the Day
The man who has the courage of his platitudes is always a successful man.
- Van Wyck Brooks
- Van Wyck Brooks
I knew it!
This story from CNN says that lettuce, tuna and sprouts are among the top ten foods responsible for outbreaks of illness. I knew those bastards were out to get me!
Monday, October 5, 2009
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Quote of the Day
The missionaries go forth to Christianize the savages - as if the savages weren't dangerous enough already.
- Edward Abbey
- Edward Abbey
Vacation
For those of you who think I'm on the equvialent of an extended holiday, think again. Today I've had to change the term plans of eight classes to fit my absence. Tests, term papers, everything gets messed up because of the stroke. I'd just as soon NOT have had it, thank you very much.
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Quote of the Day
DON'T PANIC
- Douglas Adams
(Written in large, friendly letters on the front of "The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy".)
- Douglas Adams
(Written in large, friendly letters on the front of "The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy".)
Friday, October 2, 2009
Thursday, October 1, 2009
New Project: Quotes
As some of you will know, I've been sending out quotes daily on ICQ and then weekly on email since Oct 1, 1999 till this summer. Now that I have time on my hands I'm going to start posting them here, one by one. Watch this space!
Quote for Thursday October 1, 2009:
"To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance."
- Oscar Wilde
Quote for Thursday October 1, 2009:
"To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance."
- Oscar Wilde
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Update
Went to the county hospital Monday and Tuesday, then spent the night at the local hospital. Bottom line: They did lots of tests but couldn't find anything. Which probably means the blockage is in veins in the head... so now I'm officially a blockhead.
I'm on a month's sick leave and got TWO months driving ban. Dunno how I'm going to juggle work and busing for that last month, ugh. Was told that I need to rest, which I intend to do to the utmost of my capability. I am simply going to vegetate for the next 5 weeks; watch TV and DVDs, read and catch up on sleep, sweet sleep.
I'm on a month's sick leave and got TWO months driving ban. Dunno how I'm going to juggle work and busing for that last month, ugh. Was told that I need to rest, which I intend to do to the utmost of my capability. I am simply going to vegetate for the next 5 weeks; watch TV and DVDs, read and catch up on sleep, sweet sleep.
Friday, September 25, 2009
Headcase
Friday, August 28 I had a mini-stroke of some sorts. Being an idiot I have tried to soldier on in the hopes it might get better (which it has, but not enough). Got an MR on Wednesday and it showed some damage, as there are parts of my brain that haven't been getting enough oxygen. I'm on sick leave for now and will probably be ok again, but it'll take some time before I'm back to my usual, sarcastic self.
Going to the county hospital Monday for further check-ups to find out what's causing the lack of oxygen - probably a clot. Could be the heart, could be veins. So have at it in the comments...
Going to the county hospital Monday for further check-ups to find out what's causing the lack of oxygen - probably a clot. Could be the heart, could be veins. So have at it in the comments...
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Cracking numbers
The effin Red-Green coalition has "won" the national elections and are set for another four years of governing. However, due to Norways electoral system, the opposition gained more votes than the Red-Greens while coming up just short of a majority in Parliament (2 reps). I have calculated the numbers for the whole country as one circuit, and they are as follow (actual election result in parenthesis):
AP (Labour): 60 (64)
SV (Socialist): 11 (11)
SP (Agrarian): 10 (11)
R (Commies): 2 (-)
MGP (Greens): 1 (-)
PP (Pensioners): 1 (-)
V (Liberals): 7 (2) (These poor bastards didn't make the 4% national threshold)
KrF (Christians): 9 (10)
H (Conservatives): 29 (30)
Frp (Populist): 39 (41)
So we see that the Red-Greens would get 81 seats, 83 with the Commies. The center-right opposition would get 84 seats. This result would leave the Greens and the Pensioners holding the balance.
AP (Labour): 60 (64)
SV (Socialist): 11 (11)
SP (Agrarian): 10 (11)
R (Commies): 2 (-)
MGP (Greens): 1 (-)
PP (Pensioners): 1 (-)
V (Liberals): 7 (2) (These poor bastards didn't make the 4% national threshold)
KrF (Christians): 9 (10)
H (Conservatives): 29 (30)
Frp (Populist): 39 (41)
So we see that the Red-Greens would get 81 seats, 83 with the Commies. The center-right opposition would get 84 seats. This result would leave the Greens and the Pensioners holding the balance.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Sunday, August 23, 2009
Boycotting Scotland
It is with a heavy heart that I hereby announce my personal boycott of all things Scottish until the current terrorist appeasers have been removed from office, which hopefully should happen in early May 2011 at the very latest. I was actually pondering a trip for fall break, but no longer. One would expect nothing better from the French and the Italians, but it is heartbreaking to watch the land of William Wallace appeasing a bunch of insane, murderous camel molesters like the Libyans.
Sunday, August 16, 2009
Exit Prague
So here I am, just killing time before I have to fly home to Norway. Still don't want to go home, I like the relaxed life down here, like hanging out in the hostel bar and meet new people every night. Sigh.
Took a walk around the fortifications up at Vysehrad again yesterday, it's a really nice area with great views. Slept much of the afternoon, then a fun night with cool people in the bar. You can find all the pictures from this trip here.
View of the Vltava (Moldau) river and Petrin hill in the distance.
Sweet Jebus, I love this city.
Stuart and Kirsti, a very nice couple from Southampton. Kirsti is a history teacher, so we had lots to talk about.
Me and Stuart + me and Conor, an American who's been living at the hostel for several weeks. Damn funny guy. We harmonise Simon & Garfunkel tunes so well we should really go on the road.
Jana, the Czech girlfriend of Spencer the Bartender. An angel in appearance and mind, although I do manage to get a rise out of her by calling her Heidi and yodel (it's the pigtails).
Took a walk around the fortifications up at Vysehrad again yesterday, it's a really nice area with great views. Slept much of the afternoon, then a fun night with cool people in the bar. You can find all the pictures from this trip here.
View of the Vltava (Moldau) river and Petrin hill in the distance.
Sweet Jebus, I love this city.
Stuart and Kirsti, a very nice couple from Southampton. Kirsti is a history teacher, so we had lots to talk about.
Me and Stuart + me and Conor, an American who's been living at the hostel for several weeks. Damn funny guy. We harmonise Simon & Garfunkel tunes so well we should really go on the road.
Jana, the Czech girlfriend of Spencer the Bartender. An angel in appearance and mind, although I do manage to get a rise out of her by calling her Heidi and yodel (it's the pigtails).
Thursday, August 13, 2009
More from Prague
I keep having such great evenings down here, so many cool people passing through... Danes, Italians, Israelis, Americans... even Krauts! The first weekend I met two really nice German girls; one of them, Marie, had spent time in the US as an exchange student. At the age of 19, this nice, pretty blonde had already traveled to around 40 countries - which is as much as I have at twice that age. Also, I am anything but nice & pretty. I swear, if it wasn't for the fact that she still had a German accent I would probably have had to kill her out of sheer envy. Anyways, we all had a blast as witnessed by the pics below and the two girls were unanimously declared Best Germans Ever by me and the bar staff/regulars.
Two nights ago this crazy New York guy (who's working as a carpenter but actually has three years of English literature from college) gave a semi drunken, profanity filled 15 minute summary of Hamlet that was not just factually right and to the point, but also hilarious. I didn't count, but I'm pretty sure that he used the word "fuck" or varieties thereof more than all previous analysis of Hamlet put together. Yesterday him and the bartender, who's an ex-New Yorker entertained us with insane stories of subway rides, crime, housing, etc, etc.
Tonight I've spent much of my time talking to a couple of really nice Israelis, who had an impressive command of important subjects like Monty Python and Denis Leary and who also had lots of insane stories from their time in the Israeli army (chief amongst them: A top terrorist was actually caught on video by Israeli intelligence while fucking a sheep - and Israeli intelligence along the Lebanese border routinely spot the local Arabs fornicating with donkeys. Where's YouTube when you need it?). I've also impressed by managing to discern Pepsi (evil) from Coke (good) not simply by looking at their foam in the glass, I could even tell the difference when they were almost completely still and bubbleless.
I've also been hanging out with a very funny yank who's something of a stoner, but still smart enough to keep the conversation (mostly) interesting. Full of fun and always with a big grin he feeds us wild ideas and funny stories almost every night. I've also gotten to know the new female bartender, who at age 19 is probably more mature and independent than yours truly, and certainly a good deal more than any of the slackers I teach back home.
Today my boss (not knowing I was abroad) called me to discuss the staff meetings we're having Monday and Tuesday next week. It suddenly brought back to me the sad fact that I'm flying home Sunday and all this will be just a memory. I'm looking forward to seeing my colleagues again, but I'm really, really, really not looking forward to going back to actual work. Is a lottery win really too much to ask for?
Marie the Blonde and Tommy the Bartender + Hanna, the other Best German. I should hasten to add that there are probably images of me in a red fez on some German website right now... and I can't even blame it on alcohol).
Marie and Spencer the bar manager - a really cool New Yorker.
Spencer, Marie and Tommy. Awwww, look at their cute little faces...
Two nights ago this crazy New York guy (who's working as a carpenter but actually has three years of English literature from college) gave a semi drunken, profanity filled 15 minute summary of Hamlet that was not just factually right and to the point, but also hilarious. I didn't count, but I'm pretty sure that he used the word "fuck" or varieties thereof more than all previous analysis of Hamlet put together. Yesterday him and the bartender, who's an ex-New Yorker entertained us with insane stories of subway rides, crime, housing, etc, etc.
Tonight I've spent much of my time talking to a couple of really nice Israelis, who had an impressive command of important subjects like Monty Python and Denis Leary and who also had lots of insane stories from their time in the Israeli army (chief amongst them: A top terrorist was actually caught on video by Israeli intelligence while fucking a sheep - and Israeli intelligence along the Lebanese border routinely spot the local Arabs fornicating with donkeys. Where's YouTube when you need it?). I've also impressed by managing to discern Pepsi (evil) from Coke (good) not simply by looking at their foam in the glass, I could even tell the difference when they were almost completely still and bubbleless.
I've also been hanging out with a very funny yank who's something of a stoner, but still smart enough to keep the conversation (mostly) interesting. Full of fun and always with a big grin he feeds us wild ideas and funny stories almost every night. I've also gotten to know the new female bartender, who at age 19 is probably more mature and independent than yours truly, and certainly a good deal more than any of the slackers I teach back home.
Today my boss (not knowing I was abroad) called me to discuss the staff meetings we're having Monday and Tuesday next week. It suddenly brought back to me the sad fact that I'm flying home Sunday and all this will be just a memory. I'm looking forward to seeing my colleagues again, but I'm really, really, really not looking forward to going back to actual work. Is a lottery win really too much to ask for?
Marie the Blonde and Tommy the Bartender + Hanna, the other Best German. I should hasten to add that there are probably images of me in a red fez on some German website right now... and I can't even blame it on alcohol).
Marie and Spencer the bar manager - a really cool New Yorker.
Spencer, Marie and Tommy. Awwww, look at their cute little faces...
Sunday, August 9, 2009
Scotland on the Moldau
Absurd day yesterday. On a whim I took the metro up to the lovely Vysehrad area, with its citadel, park, historic cemetary and views over the Moldau. I started out in the cemetary, where I took pics of the graves of Dvorak and Smetana (plus some cheeseburger pics) and then proceeded to walk outside and down towards the river. Suddenly I heard music. It sounded strangely Celtic. I peered up through the holes in the wall, and yes, there were people in there! I ran back up as fast as my stocky little legs and whalelike body allowed to find the 4th Czech Celtic Music Festival in full swing.
Ya'll knows how much ah lubs Scottish folk music, right? So I forked over the 250Kc (€10/$15) for entrance and then spent a happy, sunny Saturday listening to various Czech and Czech/British bands play Irish and Scottish music. The performers were very good and the music was footstomping, I even bought two CDs. The food was greasy, good and cheap and I even bought some souvenirs - a bit of pottery and some drinking horns made from god knows what. The seller didn't speak a word of English, all he could say was "african, african". When I forked over 2,600Kc (€100/$150) for five horns he eagerly shook my hand (that's when I noticed he was missing a finger) and smiled like I'd just donated a kidney. Which, in financial terms, I probably had.
The graves of Dvorak and Smetana, two of the world's finest composers.
You know you want it. I can haz cheeseburger?
Do I want fries with that? Hmmm.
Please, darling... just one more burger!
Ouch, ketchup in my eye!
I told you keep the fuck away from my cheeseburger!
A little known fact about Jesus, is that he was really into rave music.
The Czech band RiRa. They really rocked the joint, so I bought their CD. I tried to get the singer to sign it, but my cunting pen (thanks for the expression, Stef!) chose that moment to die on me.
The Czech band Jauvajs. Bought their CD too. The blonde singer has an angelic voice and the fiddler is a purdy lil' thing.
Stir fried dough, here covered with strawberry jam. You can also put tomato sauce and cheese on them and voila, you've got a makeshift pizza. The Czechs are strange people.
Sunset in color and b&w. Ish nice.
Ya'll knows how much ah lubs Scottish folk music, right? So I forked over the 250Kc (€10/$15) for entrance and then spent a happy, sunny Saturday listening to various Czech and Czech/British bands play Irish and Scottish music. The performers were very good and the music was footstomping, I even bought two CDs. The food was greasy, good and cheap and I even bought some souvenirs - a bit of pottery and some drinking horns made from god knows what. The seller didn't speak a word of English, all he could say was "african, african". When I forked over 2,600Kc (€100/$150) for five horns he eagerly shook my hand (that's when I noticed he was missing a finger) and smiled like I'd just donated a kidney. Which, in financial terms, I probably had.
The graves of Dvorak and Smetana, two of the world's finest composers.
You know you want it. I can haz cheeseburger?
Do I want fries with that? Hmmm.
Please, darling... just one more burger!
Ouch, ketchup in my eye!
I told you keep the fuck away from my cheeseburger!
A little known fact about Jesus, is that he was really into rave music.
The Czech band RiRa. They really rocked the joint, so I bought their CD. I tried to get the singer to sign it, but my cunting pen (thanks for the expression, Stef!) chose that moment to die on me.
The Czech band Jauvajs. Bought their CD too. The blonde singer has an angelic voice and the fiddler is a purdy lil' thing.
Stir fried dough, here covered with strawberry jam. You can also put tomato sauce and cheese on them and voila, you've got a makeshift pizza. The Czechs are strange people.
Sunset in color and b&w. Ish nice.
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Kutna Hora
On Sunday I went out to the old mining town of Kutna Hora, about an hour east of Prague. Czech trains are cheap, but slow. One funny twist: at the central train station in Prague every announcement over the loudspeakers is heralded by a few tones from Smetana's "Ma Vlast" (of which the famous "Moldau" is a part).
I stayed at the basic but functionable (and cheap!) Hotel Kreta, which also has a Czech restaurant on the 1st floor. I indulged in the traditional Czech dish Svíčková na smetaně - beef with cream - which in addition contains a sweet and sour sauce, some jam and a heap of knedlíky (dumplings). The veggies, to the extent there are any, are overpowered by the meat and the sauce so it's safe fare for a carnivore like me. It's very filling and very yummy although most Czechs seem to believe no foreigner could possibly like it, I usually get a raised eyebrow when I ask for it.
I'd been told by several people that it was a really nice, medieval town but personally I found it to be rather dull in most respects. Some nice old buildings, sure, but nothing you can't find in Prague and on a Sunday evening it's impossible to get a decent meal after 9PM - the only place open was a cafe called Harmonia and they served the worst food I've ever had - a pork steak that was so hard I could barely cut it, much less chew it. Even the fries were horrible. One bright point was a bar - I forget its name, it's on Vladislavova street, right opposite a closed down hotel - that sold the best heated nachos I've ever had. Additionally, the waitress was both stunningly purdy and very nice.
I also have issues with the flexibility of their attractions. The Museum of Czech silver only allowed people to enter in groups and you would have had to book in advance. The next day I tried to see the city museum, but again I could only go with a guide and the next English speaking one was not available for a good 90 minutes. When people are that little interested in getting my money I'd rather spend it in a place where they show some appreciation for it.
I did see the huge Church of St Barbara - patron saint of mine workers - and the somewhat creepy Sedlec Ossuary where you can see various decorations made out of the bones of tens of thousands of corpses. Kutna Hora and its silver industry once rivaled the power of Prague, but today it's barely worth a visit, a day is certainly more than enough.
The chandelier supposedly contains at least one of every bone in the human body.
I see dead people.
After seeing all those skeletons, my appetite was really sharpened - after all, one wouldn't want to become skeletal while still alive, right?
I even indulged in dessert. No point in taking chances!
Some pics of Kutna Hora houses.
Church of St Barbara.
These old churches always have something Hogwarty about them.
The interior.
No church visit would be complete without a few examples of "I can haz cheeseburger" art.
"Gimme a cheeseburger or I drop the towel!"
Lastly, a wtf-moment as I passed by a souvenir shop.
All Kutna Hora pics here.
I stayed at the basic but functionable (and cheap!) Hotel Kreta, which also has a Czech restaurant on the 1st floor. I indulged in the traditional Czech dish Svíčková na smetaně - beef with cream - which in addition contains a sweet and sour sauce, some jam and a heap of knedlíky (dumplings). The veggies, to the extent there are any, are overpowered by the meat and the sauce so it's safe fare for a carnivore like me. It's very filling and very yummy although most Czechs seem to believe no foreigner could possibly like it, I usually get a raised eyebrow when I ask for it.
I'd been told by several people that it was a really nice, medieval town but personally I found it to be rather dull in most respects. Some nice old buildings, sure, but nothing you can't find in Prague and on a Sunday evening it's impossible to get a decent meal after 9PM - the only place open was a cafe called Harmonia and they served the worst food I've ever had - a pork steak that was so hard I could barely cut it, much less chew it. Even the fries were horrible. One bright point was a bar - I forget its name, it's on Vladislavova street, right opposite a closed down hotel - that sold the best heated nachos I've ever had. Additionally, the waitress was both stunningly purdy and very nice.
I also have issues with the flexibility of their attractions. The Museum of Czech silver only allowed people to enter in groups and you would have had to book in advance. The next day I tried to see the city museum, but again I could only go with a guide and the next English speaking one was not available for a good 90 minutes. When people are that little interested in getting my money I'd rather spend it in a place where they show some appreciation for it.
I did see the huge Church of St Barbara - patron saint of mine workers - and the somewhat creepy Sedlec Ossuary where you can see various decorations made out of the bones of tens of thousands of corpses. Kutna Hora and its silver industry once rivaled the power of Prague, but today it's barely worth a visit, a day is certainly more than enough.
The chandelier supposedly contains at least one of every bone in the human body.
I see dead people.
After seeing all those skeletons, my appetite was really sharpened - after all, one wouldn't want to become skeletal while still alive, right?
I even indulged in dessert. No point in taking chances!
Some pics of Kutna Hora houses.
Church of St Barbara.
These old churches always have something Hogwarty about them.
The interior.
No church visit would be complete without a few examples of "I can haz cheeseburger" art.
"Gimme a cheeseburger or I drop the towel!"
Lastly, a wtf-moment as I passed by a souvenir shop.
All Kutna Hora pics here.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
