Why I hate modern technology

So I'm sitting in my motel room in Macedonia, Ohio. Starving. Famished. Hollowed out. Why? Because when I ordered a pizza 75 minutes ago, I made the mistake of trusting the internets. Allow me to explain.

I'd gotten a brochure for the pizza chain "Romeos" from the motel front desk and since it didn't list a place in this town, I put the hotel zip code in the pizza place's web page. It told me that "Medina" was the closest to me. I call the number for Medina, give them my address and make an order, then sit back, drooling in anticipation.

I then get a phone call from the delivery guy. He says he's at a motel 6 but they don't HAVE my room number in their building. So I give him the address again and he says he'll be right down.

Fully one hour after I made my order he calls again, somewhat desperate, enquiring as to just where the fuck I am (I'm paraphrasing for dramatic effect, he was professional throughout the whole conversation). I repeat my address for the THIRD time and this time a light bulb goes off. Turns out both the pizza place, the driver and my beloved but rapidly cooling pizza is located 45 fucking minutes away. The fucking internet page has given me the wrong fucking restaurant.

So I call Medina, get the order cancelled, chew them out over their web page and ask them which restaurant I should have called, being in Macedonia. They say Twinsburg. As soon as we end the call I walk over to the reception to confirm this new address. There, they laugh themselves silly over me having tried to get a pizza from Medina before telling me that while Twinsburg is reasonably close, they won't deliver to Macedonia. I need to call Northfield.

So that's what I've done. Now I am waiting for Northfield to deliver. I am starved, nay famished, nay hollowed out. This pizza better be fuckin' GOOD, that's all I have to say.